tiny habits

[oak]

We have a few days since your most recent post. Any updates?

Any particularly good or bad days?

[manuel_moe_g]

The biggest thing i have noticed, in doing celebrations, is how previously i would deny myself celebrations, in fact i would berate myself.

[oak]

That’s good. We celebrate with you.

Feel free to share here about celebrations, no matter how “small”, to the extent you feel comfortable, remembering that there is no such thing as a small accomplishment.

[Beany Boo]

The biggest thing i have noticed, in doing celebrations, is how previously i would deny myself celebrations, in fact i would berate myself.

This is so huge.

Mind blown.

[manuel_moe_g]

I am trying, experimenting, with the habit of urgency toward the items on my To-Do list.

With this new "Tiny Habits" way of thinking, that means I have a whole bunch of little celebrations in my future.

In the past, with my habitual way of doing things, making such a change would have the opposite implication: I would know in the back of my mind that I would have a lot of berating myself and other forms of self-hatred coming my way.

So that is an interesting change.

Also, I am going to embrace failure, make it "My Old Friend Failure", my "Signal That I Need A Course Correction", or my "Reminder That I Am Simply Human"

But especially, less twitter, less facebook, less reddit browsing, that is where the time is going to come from for my change. Everytime I recognize that I am making a different choice in the moment, I will have a little celebration.

It is easy when I am by myself, I pump my arms and throw my arms up over my head in the shape of a capital "V" for "Victory". When other people are around, I haven't really figured that out - but at least I am not berating myself.

[manuel_moe_g]

working on my To-Do list

there is such a temptation to waste time on social-media/internet

(also such a temptation to berate myself for not working hard enough)

but I am doing my little celebrations, in private moments, by pumping my arms above my head.

my little failures tell me about my personal challenges, i can't beat myself up into a place where my personal challenges melt away

[manuel_moe_g]

just had my therapy session

a lot of stuff about my inner child, leaving my comfort zone, tiny habits, and replacing the word "mistake" with the word "discovery"

...at the end of the session, i guide my inner child back to his peaceful place where he can rest while i concentrate on being an adult

three things i told him as we went back to his peaceful place hand in hand:

• going to have a lot of fun outside of comfort zone
• going to have a lot of <Discoveries> instead of mistakes
• going to be gentle with self-critiques, and also replace them with <Discoveries> (being gentle with self-critiques, because at their root they simply want what is best for me, but then they go overboard)

[oak]

Very good, Manuel Moe.

I especially like replacing "mistakes" with "discoveries".

If you get a chance to apply this in your daily life in the coming week, please share here.

[Beany Boo]

Amazing...

“Discoveries”

What a gift...

I’m adopting the V for victory raised arms

And the butterfly hug

Except I imagine it’s a group hug

[manuel_moe_g]

Still progressing on "Tiny Habits" Book

Chapter 8 is "How We Change Together" which is about changing _other_ people, something I have absolutely no interest in. Maybe later when I read through this book again.

Not having as many celebrations as I expected, but that is OK, Monday through Wednesday I was working on tax stuff, really un-fun stuff that I dread a lot. When I finished on late Wednesday, I had a tiny celebration where I pumped by arms above my head a gave off a little cheer. That was the extent of my tiny celebrations.