Convention(al) Anxiety

[oak]

I work about three miles from where a major party is holding its convention this summer.

As a citizen, I honor freedom of assembly. I hope everyone has a nice time at their convention and that it is a powerful, positive experience for all involved.

Setting aside the political side of this, which is important but not the point of this thread.

Speaking strictly for myself, and in a narrow way, the thought of this convention gives me anxiety for three reasons:

1. Much as I like/love individual people, I get really nervous around groups.

2. I get doubly nervous when ideologically-charged people congregate.

3. I get doubly nervous again when ideologically-charged folks from opposite sides of the spectrum are put together, in a small area, with high stakes on the outcome.

[Kismet]

Totally understand.
I have severe anxiety now. I'm physically disabled now.
I used to be very politically active. If it is a party I support I'd probably be upset and anxious I wouldn't be able to go due to these issues. If it's a party I have a problem with I'd be upset and anxious I wouldn't be able to go protest anymore/ what a failure my life has become.
I know probably not exactly what you mean but I get the anxiety this would cause. Good luck.

[oak]

Thanks Kismet!

These situations are a chance to discuss and explore some of the most important topics in our lives, something we get to do so rarely.

Happily, I'll be watching this unfold via TV and online, 20 miles away. And if, heaven forbid, things get really bad I've got a bug out bag, a full tank of gas, and a map on my phone to go on a little vacation.

[oak]

Today's Anxiety: 6 of 10.

The bad: Today, while driving around the periphery of the city (~10-15 miles away), I saw fleets of snowplows lined up along a major highway.

Since there is unlikely to be snow in July, my mind races. The only thing I can guess is that they will be used to quickly close roads.

I also saw, inexplicably, rented schoolbuses idling near exits. Just sitting there on a Saturday afternoon. Who are they looking to evacuate?

The good:

If things get bad in the city, I can bug in here in the suburbs. I got a bunch of meat, milk, spaghetti, cereal, fruit, pop, cake mix, and candy. I also went out of my way to refill my buspirone. With what I got today I could eat pretty well for a week.

If things get _real_ bad, I can bug out on short notice. I have a full tank of gas, a few dollars in cash, several gallons of water, a change of clothes, toiletries, a tent in the trunk, a paper map, GPS, and charger for my phone. I can grab my bug out bag, laptop, buspirone, and be on the road in five minutes.

Whatever happens, I also have an important professional-development effort I've been working on for some time. I can distract myself with that.

I am sixty percent sure things will be tense/fraught/ultimately okay.

If things are not okay I might be conducting a MIHH Summer Tour 16, coming to a town near you.

[brownblob]

Take it easy oak
I saw a clip of the snow plows on the national news. I wasn't really paying attention but I think they're basically road blocks. After what happened in France, I hope the summer just goes by peacefully. Make sure you have plenty of water in your bunker.

[Beany Boo]

Oh shit...

All I can say is you've done a great job of keeping yourself safe, although it probably doesn't feel like it.

I don't know if anyone else experiences this, but I think the worst thing that could happen now, is that everything turns out to be okay.

I'll be thinking of you, as you make your way through today.

[oak]

Thanks for your posts! They helped calm me.

And yes, water was the first thing I bought. I have a Life Straw in my car.

Today's Anxiety: 2

Just for fun I swung by the dollar store to pick up some more water, Vienna sausage, and batteries (the first things that sell out in a crisis). There was plenty of all of these.

I've got my bug out checklist ready. At this point I am doing things like checking that I have spare eyeglasses in the car, that I have a change of clothes ready, and am baking and freezing food.

I am getting a bit deeper into the intense professional-development skill I can be teaching myself over the next ten days.

_If_ I complete this online tutorial I will greatly increase my odds of a good job in the next few months.

I can't be engrossed in this tutorial and anxious at the same moment.

Things are fairly normal.

Thanks for listening.

[rivergirl]

How are things going there, Oak?

I imagine that having anxiety doesn't help, but I don't think your concerns are irrational either. When one of the candidates spoke a couple of months ago in a venue I pass by every day there was violence outside. I don't remember that happening in any previous election since I began voting.

I hope all is calm & you are safe & well.

[oak]

Hi Rivergirl.

Yes, things have been calm here in the suburbs.

My anxiety is pretty low. Still, you never know what can happen on the last day.

I am proud that my prepping efforts 18 months ago gave me a sense of calm when things were so unknown.

[rivergirl]

I'm glad you're feeling prepared and relatively safe, Oak.

Take care.