Less money, more problems.
Posted: November 27th, 2013, 5:05 pm
I just recently moved out of my parents house. This should be an exciting time for me, but it's not. Because of my own compulsiveness and spending to feed my addiction, I don't know how I'm going to pay my rent next week. I feel as if I'm addicted to failure and disappointment. It's like I enjoy fucking up so my parents can tell me how bad of a job I'm doing. I'm just a spoiled brat who doesn't know how to be responsible. I love to think about the mistakes I've made so I can confirm that I'm a bad person. I know I'll eventually tell my parents the truth when I run out of options and this will just add to the basket of things that they can hang over my head. I just feel sick to my stomach right now. I'm disgusted with myself. I always seem to self destruct eventually. I'll have a some good stretches where I don't fuck up and I don't need to ask for help, but it's like it's only a matter of time before I screw myself. I'm sorry this is all over the place, I just needed to vent.