Mentalpod Dream

[kitkat]

I thought this would be fun to share. I had a dream last night that I was at a Mental Illness happy Hour retreat with a whole bunch of listeners. My brother and sister and mom were there too, to escort or look after me or something. There was one part where we all gathered in a room like a classroom with a stage at the front where Paul was giving a speech and I think we all shared stories and whatnot. At one point, one of the listeners that had also been on the podcast came up to me to tell me we were all going out for dinner and I remember feeling very included even though I didn't know any of these people. We all started filing out of the classroom, everyone making jokes with Paul, it was like we were all at camp together. In the dream I started to get anxious and worried and thought I would have a panic attack. I started to tell at my brother or someone, but I almost immediately looked around the crowd and realized that no one was judging me and that I didn't have to worry about having a panic attack or someone thinking I was crazy because everyone knew was it wa like or what was going on. And I felt very calm and like I'd never have trouble with anxiety again. And then we all went for ice cream and I woke up feeling pretty hopeful.

I hope this doesn't sound weird since I don't know you guys really, but it made me happy to have this dream. A lot of my dreams involve me having an anxiety attack or break down where I am crying and yelling and no one cares or can hear me or they think I'm over reacting. So it was nice to have a dream where the cycle broke.

[oak]

That is very sweet. I got a little teary-eyed.

Maybe someday we'll live in a world you described. Thanks for posting. Hugs.

[kitkat]

Thanks, oak, I hope so too. Whenever I see people mentioning get together or meet ups, I feel really anxious, but also sad because I feel like, with my social anxiety, I could never go to one even if I wanted to. But maybe someday it will be easier. Hugs back at you.

[shanarchy]

I want to go to that retreat!

[Paul Gilmartin]

KitKat, Oak and Shanarchy,

I'm so touched. That's kind of my dream too. We had a really nice get together in Portland where some listeners gathered a couple of times and we recorded some stuff, and also hung out. I had that feeling you describe, and I'd like to think some of the listeners did as well. It felt soooo safe to me. It's how I feel in my favorite support groups.

So my hope is to one day take the podcast on the road and make it happen. Being around listeners who know my story is kind of what I always wanted as a performer; to be understood, felt, accepted and appreciated. I really couldn't ask for any more from you guys. Sometimes it makes me giddy. Like I'm the luckiest guy on the planet.

So thanks for sharing that

Paul

[kitkat]

Thanks Paul! Hearing about Portland makes me feel hopeful that something like that could happen again. And if it ever happens close to me, I hope that I can gather the courage to join you guys and get that feeling in real life.

And I think we're all pretty lucky to have this community (I hope that doesn't sound super cheesy, haha, but it's true). Every time it grows, it makes me feel less alone.

[IceLupus]

I liked the feeling of that dream KitKat.

But instead of a camp could we make it a real nice cruise somewhere? Imagine a cruise filled with Mental Illness Podcast listeners. Mental health professionals. Groups therapy with new friends / fans. Live Podcasts. And best of all a marathon viewing of the best Dinner and Movie episodes as picked by Paul's fans. I would sell my prized rare video games to go on a cruise like that.

-IceLupus-

[kitkat]

Haha, that sounds like so much fun! (minus the seasickness, hehe) Group therapy while we see the world and Paul can teach us how to cook and watch movies at the same time. ;D Perfect!

Oh, and you can't sell those prized video games, we need those to play on the big screen.

[IceLupus]

Don't worry KitKat I am not going to sell my prized rare games. I am thinking about writing here, a post, about video game addiction vs. video games as a release.

As for the cruise. I think it would be awesome to do and I am sure the listeners could come up with a list of movies for everyone to enjoy. Best part is that since it's not on T.V. Paul can go No holds barred on the movies.
Keep having those great dreams KitKat and please keep sharing them.

[kitkat]

Oooh, I'd be very interested in reading that video game addiction post. I have gotten in to the cycle myself.

Thanks, I'll surely post if my subconscious makes a sequel! ;D