Harassing call, and text. Plan.

[oak]

I posted here, very fraught.

I've deleted it, because I don't want to give the situation any more energy.

[manuel_moe_g]

Hello Oak!

Thanks for keeping us informed. Best of luck to you as you work through this difficulty. All the best.

[oak]

Thanks Manuel Moe!

Your encouragement meant alot to me. I took several actions only because of what you said.

I am still troubled by the experience, but I am in better shape now than I was 24 hours ago.

Should I receiving any more harassing/threatening phone calls I know exactly what to do. I have people in place, who now know me and my situation.

[oak]

The harassment has continued.

Both my employer (it is happening at work now) and my family of origin state that I am overreacting. I was told to pretend that the harassment isn't happening.

My family of origin then began taking my inventory (listing my faults and failures).

I am not sure what this new normal will be. Whatever it is I want it to be different, more healing.

I want to find a community, a "family" that will accept me and my wounds.

I do have this community in this forum. It is most, or nearly all, of the support I have.

I am hurting.

I also have a plan.

[brownblob]

Sorry to hear you are going through this Oak.

[Namu]

Good golly, oak! I'm so sorry you're having to experience this! It sounds nightmarish.

Your family sound rather horrible. Am I understanding correctly, that your employer was initially supportive, but now says you're over-reacting? What about your lawyer? Is there anyone in real life that's helpful about this?

I can't recall whether you have a therapist. It sounds like you need someone rational, trustworthy, and supportive enough to help you sort through the details of what's happening, so you can have the benefits of understanding exactly what's at risk, what you need to accept as beyond your control, and every bit of what you can do to protect yourself. If your lawyer's still on your side, can you ask him/her to lay out all the facts in a way you can understand?

I'm thinking of you with compassion, and with hope that this new assault will become less fearsome as you figure out each next step. I wish you courage and strength and success.

Hugs,

Namu

[oak]

Namu, thank you!

I've not had many reasons to smile lately. Your kind post brought me joy and comfort. You are a pillow in a world of cactus.

Yes, I think I see exactly what you are getting at: creating a family, a tribe.

I unfortunately don't have a therapist (my insurance's byzantine rules...surprise!).

I do have the lawyer and police officer, both who are very competent and calm. They both gave me easygoing assurances to "call anytime". Neither are intimidated, at all. I have a probably-good-enough, hodgepodge of sympathetic people: a supervisor at work (not my direct supervisor) and believe it or not, my physical therapist.

All I the cheesy (and wonderful) tropes I'm always talking about in this forum: use my words, only as sick as my secrets: it turns out my family members are dying for a lack of these tropes. I see them making very counterproductive actions, and I realize that I had to break out of what I assumed was normal. Love is really the only solution. I see loved lived as kindness, thoughtfulness, gentleness, honesty, action. These poor choices will cost my family members their lives (ignoring health problems), and it has certainly cost them quality of life.

What chills me the most, my friends, is to realize that people around me don't have my best interest in mind. Some people want to threaten and harm me, and my supposed friends find this inconvenient.

Perhaps I need to move on and make real friends, make a real family.