I am a longtime listener and occasional donor to the podcast. First of all, if Paul or anyone involved in the production of the show is reading, thank you for what you do.
I am around 40 male, married, no kids. Most people would consider me somewhat normal, as I have a decent job, own a home, have long-term relationship, etc. However, I have struggled with anxiety and depression as long as I can remember. I contemplate suidice several times a day.
My condition(s) have worsened in the past year. My panic attacks are frustrating my wife to the point where I'm pretty sure she will bail soon. I have tried every med there is and nothing has really helped. I also drink way too much (at least a six pack every night after I get home) but I have had multi-month periods of sobriety and my depression/anxiety never improved.
I've pretty much given up. I don't even know why I'm bothering writing this--I don't have anything positive to say. I guess I'm just venting to a group of anonymous people who probably feel similar things and won't judge me.
Anyway, best of luck to everyone out there. I feel stupid saying "you are not alone" but every time Paul does I feel a little better. So...you are not alone.
Introducing myself here
-
ghughes1980
- Posts: 299
- Joined: December 31st, 2012, 1:15 pm
- Gender: male
- Issues: Physical disability, mental disability, depression, anxiety, PTSD
- preferred pronoun: He
- Location: Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Re: Introducing myself here
Welcome
Re: Introducing myself here
Hello ColemanSilk,
I haven't introduced myself yet to this forum (I'm sure I will when ready), but wanted to welcome you and also extend my appreciation for this 'thing' that Mr. Gilmartin is providing - that f'ing maniac! (And when I use the word maniac I mean it in the best possible and loving way!)
Anyway, maybe you do have a decent job, home, wife, blah blah blah. So what? Perhaps that isn't what you want need. I certainly don't believe in the "grass is greener" trope, but I do believe that there are different species of grass which may grow a better lawn... for you. I've been on meds for over 6 years now and although I believe they saved my life it is still a struggle to get through just about every day in this world. I've come to the conclusion that my mind is a cage. My solution is to find a way to make it a large enough cage that it doesn't feel like one...
Yossarian Lives!!!
I haven't introduced myself yet to this forum (I'm sure I will when ready), but wanted to welcome you and also extend my appreciation for this 'thing' that Mr. Gilmartin is providing - that f'ing maniac! (And when I use the word maniac I mean it in the best possible and loving way!)
Anyway, maybe you do have a decent job, home, wife, blah blah blah. So what? Perhaps that isn't what you want need. I certainly don't believe in the "grass is greener" trope, but I do believe that there are different species of grass which may grow a better lawn... for you. I've been on meds for over 6 years now and although I believe they saved my life it is still a struggle to get through just about every day in this world. I've come to the conclusion that my mind is a cage. My solution is to find a way to make it a large enough cage that it doesn't feel like one...
Yossarian Lives!!!
"There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die."
-
ColemanSilk
- Posts: 43
- Joined: January 30th, 2013, 10:14 am
Re: Introducing myself here
Thank you both for responding.