ok... here we go................
Posted: July 3rd, 2015, 6:36 pm
Devastation. That has been the theme for the past two in a half years. Just utter devastation. I found out my stepson was arrested for murder of a child by a phone call from my mother. From that point on my life has been put on hold. Profound sadness, deep depression, and severe anxiety surrounding upcoming court dates that get pushed back. Always pushed back. Its sad to see the victim or the victim's families on the TV. Sad; they are always sad. But nothing is ever said or thought about when the person accused of committing the crime has family that is just as sad. The intrusive phone calls, emails, text messages, never asking how you are doing, but always wanting to know what the inside scoop is. No one asks how I'm doing.
I have watched my son go from proud Marine to sitting behind bars in just two years. Where did I go wrong? Guilt, how did I miss this? I should have made him go to the VA, I knew he needed treatment, I should have made him go.
I have cried all I can cry, I have eaten all the chocolate and drank all the wine I can drink. Its time to try to feel better..
Are my meds working? I don't cry in hysterics anymore, but I am still devastated.
I have watched my son go from proud Marine to sitting behind bars in just two years. Where did I go wrong? Guilt, how did I miss this? I should have made him go to the VA, I knew he needed treatment, I should have made him go.
I have cried all I can cry, I have eaten all the chocolate and drank all the wine I can drink. Its time to try to feel better..
Are my meds working? I don't cry in hysterics anymore, but I am still devastated.