YOU ARE NOT ALONE - A companion online community discussion board for The Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast with Paul Gilmartin

Hi everyone,

I've been listening to the podcast for over 6 months now and have decided to jump in. I was sexually molested by my 2 older brothers around the age of 8 or 9. I was also molested by my step-father around that age as well. I think I've been depressed ever since! I hide my pain in those days by being a straight A student and concentrating on that alone. I couldn't bring myself to tell my mother and I still don't know why.

Living with that pain and shame brought me to make very wrong decisions in my life. I dropped out of UCLA third year and began smoking cigarettes, weed and drinking. I met a man who reminded me of my father and I married him. The second wrong decision. I divorced him and then I met another man who pulled me further into drug addiction. Now I'm smoking primos! 15 years of that got me nowhere. As a matter of fact, he got another girl pregnant and left me strung out and alone! That serves me right.

Now I'm sitting here alone with nowhere to turn. Its up go me now to make some sense out of my life. So I sit here depressed, anxious and lonely.

NICE TO MEET YOU

Hi Yonnie, Welcome to the forum. :3 Thank you for sharing your story with us, I hope you will find some hope here.

Hi and welcome.

With your story, it makes perfect sense, you feel this way. If you have nowhere to turn, listening to the podcast is a great way to start. I couldn't feel any kind of sympathy for myself or my situation, but I felt something for the people telling similar stories on the show and that slowly began to have an effect on how I thought about myself.

Hi Yonnie,
I'm sorry for what you went through.
I hope the best for you!
I know how you feel, I too have anxiety with depressed and I am very lonely.
I am hoping I will feel less isolated by joining these forums.
Bobbie

Hello and welcome. Please stick around and keep us updated. I hope you can get the help you need.