YOU ARE NOT ALONE - A companion online community discussion board for The Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast with Paul Gilmartin

New listener from Stoneham, Massachusetts.

I found out about the podcast purely by accident as I was on a true crime story and it got a one-off mention. I've only heard a couple, but it's been positive enough to really get into.

I was diagnosed with Bipolar I (or II, they couldn't really nail it down) over 5 years ago. I'm also a recovering alcoholic, under two weeks away from 20 years clean. I'm fine with my condition, as it was a shock to absolutely nobody - including myself. Meds work, I have a full time job in behavioral health & substance abuse along with two sides gigs. Married, adult kids, blah de blah. Close with my family, kind of goofball, loves yard sales and bad horror movies and 80's music.

Take care!

(PS - I'll get a avatar soon)

welcome!

Always happy for new input - You seem to have a lot going for you which will help those of us that don't - I am particularly interested in hearing your personal experience parenting when you yourself have struggled with a mental issue - I have depression that will kick a horse in the teeth hard at times - it is really hard to be present and givet he kids that affirmation they crave when my mind does not want to commit to being there -

I do try quite a few things and I am trying to break habits of zoning out - however advice and insight are always incredibly appreciated - it is good to get out of ones head and see things from another perspective -

Also you should be super proud of 20 years - that is really huge and a really big deal - don't minimalize that accomplishment make sure you have a really big party with a cake and balloons and maybe a bouncy house - because they are cool

Thanks for replying and I really appreciate the kind words for the upcoming milestone. I’ll actually be relieved with it’s August 19t because it’s take the onus away a bit ( as in 20 years and 1 day, 20 years an 2 days…) My wife stopped right with me, I feel like she never gets the credit that I do.

As far as depression, it was one of those things that was happening to me without really being aware of it. I slept – a lot. I hung out in a dark bedroom for hours, someone in my family commented that I looked “old” at 44I’m 100% sire this was all brought about by me being laid off from a job I honestly thought I was going to retire from. It was so out of the blue that I never really recovered from the blow, opting to go through so many jobs that I lost count, just trying to get back to normal. That alone took a massive toll, near suicide attempt and me breaking down during a routine physical exam when questioned about snoring.

After that, I went into a partial program for about 2 weeks, got a proper diagnosis, eventually went on the right meds (lithium) and the clouds eventually cleared. That was over five years ago and was toying with the idea of writing a book based on my time before, during and after.

Let your wife know that I congratulate her as well - that it is just as much a huge deal for her to support you and not be codependent and enabling - that is also huge - to form healthy relationships in recovery is hard its a mountain unto itself - let her know that I admire her greatly for it -

Loosing anything that you feel is a core part of yourself is devastating - a relationship - a job an ability - a friendship it takes time and patience with yourself and time to grieve and I am glad that you had that time and are on a track to better days - and having a medicine to level you out is also a really good thing -

I also understand how anniversaries are scary - in a way its like well its 20 years since I was doing this bad thing - and I haven't screwed up - but I still could - I still kinda want to - it brings up memories of life before and those can be really scary and burdening - the anniversary itself can be a trigger - so be kind to yourself and hug your wife and your babies