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Hi, I'm Paige

Posted: April 2nd, 2019, 10:30 am
by paigealexis
Hi everyone! This podcast has been helping me through a lot of tough times. I emailed Paul about finding support groups around me, and sent him some of my poems, he mentioned I should share on the forum! So here I am :) these spoken words have been helping me find a way to express a lot of what I feel, so here's one that kindof introduces me:
Paige

is my name

I have no claim

to fame.

I am twenty five

very much alive,

but drowning

in my mind

with thoughts

so deep

they suffocate me

when I try to speak

or try to sleep…

it makes me feel weak.

To fight back

at my feelings

I wear a thick

“feeling-proof”

shield

made with jokes, confidence, ambition…

all emotions

concealed.

Truth is,

I’ve got pain

that’s unhealed.

Writing

poetry

this way

is a platform

I’m trying out

to say:

Hello ,

this is me.

I may

walk alongside you

every day

and play

pretend.

I am a registered nurse

so for work

I’ll don on

a glove

caring for people

you love.

Emergency and Intensive care

are the specialties

you’ll find me

they are places

I can be

completely in tune

with my patient’s repair

ignore my own despair;

my patients come first

and that is a blessing

at work.

But, it can be a curse

putting other people

first.

For when I am home

only then,

when I’m alone

do I transcend

into a place

I wish

I could erase

deep in my mind

where I always find

feelings that try

to drown me.

In the deep, dark

water of my mind

I swim around

so inclined

to overthink

feelings that

remind

me of moments

through my life

that made me feel

shame,

alone,

afraid,

disowned,

ugly

dumb

worthless

but even worse-

numb.

There is much more

to me

than my darkness

you’ll see,

I’m more

than what I do

for a living

I’m more

than the fake smile

on my face

more than

a female

or a

race.

So I will write

lots of stories

to show you inside

the thoughts

I’ve always before

tried to hide.

I hope

if I do

open my mind

to let you in

I’d finally

begin

to set myself free

through my

transparency.

Thank you for

listening

to me.

Re: Hi, I'm Paige

Posted: April 11th, 2019, 3:19 am
by rivergirl
Hi, Paige!

Welcome, and thank you for sharing.

You're not alone in your feelings.

I look forward to reading more of your poems.

rivergirl

Re: Hi, I'm Paige

Posted: April 24th, 2019, 7:49 pm
by snoringdog
Hello Paige,

I have nothing but respect for nurses. They were there for both of my parents when we needed them.
Sure, it might be "just a job", but I think it takes a a lot of concern and dedication, and I'm sure it isn't easy.

And nurses are often the unsung heroes,and have a better understanding of the patients's condition and needs than many of the doctors...

Regards

Snoringdog