YOU ARE NOT ALONE - A companion online community discussion board for The Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast with Paul Gilmartin

Here are the books Jensen mentioned, with Paul's Amazon link:


10% Happier: How I Tamed the Voice in My Head by Dan Harris
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/006226 ... PGCCLOFSQQ


The Man Who Couldn't Stop: OCD and the True Story of a Life Lost in Thought by David Adam
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/144723 ... JLRV3QYTCV

Very good episode. Jensen is very well spoken. Loved some of the really specific experiences eg. the playstation, the action figures etc. etc.

Agreed, loved how easily he told his story and how Paul just let it happen.

I thought he was very insincere. He consistently talked about how "hot" his supposed molester was, how he was in love with her and was trying to get near her, and would make comments about how you'd "have to see her". I mean, these are not the expressions of someone that was truly exploited. As I suspected throughout the interview, he decided he had been molested after a therapist talked him into thinking that's what happened. Nobody seeks out their molester, or brags about the sex they had with them. Nobody falls in love with someone who molests them. I got the impression he was only on the podcast to promote whatever pointless endeavor he's currently working on.
I was actually angry listening to most of this, because he just came off as a self-centered hipster. I don't think boys can't be molested, but this one clearly wasn't.
I have no idea which podcast everyone else here was listening to.

Hi Melancholia Frump,
I could see how a description of Jensen's experience could sound like a misuse of the term abuse when it's considered alongside other more brutal experiences that involve greater imbalances of power, etc. Along those lines, I really hesitate to describe some of my own really troubling experiences as having been "abusive." However, one of the things I like about MIHH is that it doesn't necessarily observe the boundaries of conventional definitions, and that it respects everyone's experience for what it means to them. I thought Jensen's detailed account of a whole range of conflicting feelings and triggers was very true to life for the category of experience he had -- considering his age, the lack of physical threat etc. Unlike many far less fortunate people his self-esteem isn't shattered and he's gotten along in the world. But there's a hole there. And I think that's a story worth telling.
I don't know... I guess maybe I both understand where you're coming from, but we also have to honor everyone's experiences. There are many, many people who have not had some of my basic privileges, opportunities etc. as me and who would love, for example, to be at a job that pays their bills, as I somehow find myself these days for the first time in my life. I would want to think my experience, my pain, my challenges, etc. are still valid. I will also say that I've had similar resentful reactions to certain guests and certain people I've encountered and had to really rein myself in not to unquestioningly hate them--sorry, no names.
I hope you're OK, and that this didn't turn you off to MIHH, and naturally... feel free to tell me to go fuck myself

Re: Jensen Karp
I can only imagine how uncomfortable a 12/13 year old with obsessive unwanted thoughts would feel after such an overwhelming & confusing experience. PTSD? He had a young fragile psyche, at the time, & the experience was traumatizing. He certainly doesn't seem like a typical alpha male who might have bragged about the experience in a way that bolstered his machismo. With a brain that obsesses with unintended or unwanted thoughts, I'll bet hours & hours, and days and days etc... were spent basically being on a roller coaster of thoughts & feelings, without being in control of the roller coaster, just a helpless passenger. Trying to figure out what happened, if it was wrong, what to do about it, and why, like a malfunctioning computer that computes & computes and never finds the answer. I remember being a virgin & only vaguely having a sense of how to have sex, being afraid of having a girl see me naked, being afraid to initiate.

Paul's outro monologue at 2:07:30 celebrating 4 years of MIHH.