YOU ARE NOT ALONE - A companion online community discussion board for The Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast with Paul Gilmartin

I agree, RyanN, with you about the intention thing. Of course, we can unintentionally harm other people. About the "sharer" I'm not sure how another person can have perspective about someone else's life experiences, but it's true I didn't agree with that person's approach. If I have unintentionally hurt or offended you with my comments, I apologize.

Goddamnit...I can't believe I have to say this: It's sexual molestation when an adult actually touches a minor in a sexual way. Period. End of sentence. It is not anything else. And trying to raise hurt feelings or even damaged psyches to the level of those of us who known the shock of having our innocence quite literally ripped away from us so hard and fast that I still, over 15 years later feel the cold hand on my heart...that's offensive.

although i have no dog in this fight, i think that turning suffering into a competition is always counterproductive.
we all have our own experiences and our own ways of dealing with things.
certain people have had REALLY REALLY FUCKED UP experiences that have changed them.
other people have had BAD, BUT CERTAINLY NOT AS FUCKED UP AS THAT experiences that have changed them.
person 2's suffering is not negated because person 1 suffered more/better/whatever.
nobody in this scenario 'wins' or 'loses', as both people have been changed in very real ways.
compassion, not competition.

I used to agree with that "not a competition" idea, too. I think I said as much, somewhere around here. But that was before Paul starting making EVERY DAMN EPISODE about his personal problems. If the interview didn't deal with it somewhere, then at least one of the surveys or emails he'd open or close the show with would. Suffering is not a competition, and anyway, Paul won. (I've had to stop listening to every episode...I hope he's gotten better).

That said...it's the vague, floating definitions of "sexual molestation" that was pissing me off today. It's a very specific thing that happened to me, and it shouldn't negate anyone's suffering if I say that if that didn't happen to you, THEN THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN TO YOU.

Definition, not diminution.

Ahem...

Me, earlier this week:

Paul started making EVERY DAMN EPISODE about his personal problems. If the interview didn't deal with it somewhere, then at least one of the surveys or emails he'd open or close the show with would. .... (I've had to stop listening to every episode...I hope he's gotten better).

The AV Club, today: (http://www.avclub.com/articles/sklarbro ... bes,83957/)

The Mental Illness Happy Hour #73: Listener Derrick Jackson

Gilmartin’s recent struggle to deal with his manipulative mother comes to bear as Jackson describes living with an erratic, sexualizing mother of his own.

Surprise, surprise.