Mindfulness

[Beany Boo]

Today went well though it was a struggle.

I’m starting to get confident in that moment before anyone is about to engage with me.

I just keep taking a run at listening and asking people questions. It’s a vocational skill developed through repetition. That’s my feeling about it.

Every couple of weeks, after routine practice, I get a fraction better at it.

It’s midafternoon and I’m letting it all go for today.

[Beany Boo]

Today went well though somewhat confusing.

I made vague progress.

There was a new lack of friction. I think it’s the listening I’m doing.

I’m sort of fatigued by confusion but not upset about it; that’s unfamiliar.

It’s midafternoon. Bedtime on the horizon.

[Beany Boo]

Woke up with the alarm.

Having had success with complimenting people over the last few weeks, I started complimenting myself about how well I was getting ready for work. It was surprisingly effective. I could also see the difference between when I make a real compliment and a half-baked one.

Some of my new improvement activities have turned into fixed habits. I’m putting less energy into them now and sometimes, when I don’t want to do them so much, I do them anyway because it’s easier. The new habits are ‘slow brain’ activities which I end up enjoying anyway, because they are more productive and require less processing power.

I might try to start a new good habit today, that’s even more supportive; if I can think of something.

[Beany Boo]

Woke with the alarm after sleeping through.

Spent some time complimenting myself and others. Where I had negative thoughts I made them be for a good reason. Even though doing this feels irrational it affects the brain chemistry. Example: ‘life sux, in good ways’.

No pushing today. I’m just going to respond to news as I am, rather than pretending to be super-me.

Today’s the day for locking in the paraphrasing habit. I’ve been afraid to move on it because of the unpredictable change it promises. I feel ready though and like it might give me some important control in my environment.

We’ll see.

At midafternoon.

[Beany Boo]

Today was difficult but it went well.

There were a couple of smarting moments that I managed with uncommon skill using CBT exercises.

I’m starting to differentiate between fast brain (flowing-making) and slow brain (decision-making) goals. When I’m in the fast brain (amygdala) creating flow is the objective. When I’m in slow brain (prefrontal cortex) complex decisions are possible.

I found myself paraphrasing properly at one moment when I was listening to someone today. It felt a bit vertiginous but I liked it.

It’s midafternoon and I feel like complimenting myself and others.

Hodo-hodo

[manuel_moe_g]

Fascinating, Beany

My problem is getting rational & helpful ideas from the slow part of my mind into the fast part of my mind

I am often of two minds, my fast part of the brain rejects helpful thoughts

[Beany Boo]

I am often of two minds, my fast part of the brain rejects helpful thoughts

The helpful thoughts can’t ‘Frogger’ their way through.

That’s a deep cut reference. Is Frogger familiar?

[manuel_moe_g]

Hi Beany,

Yes, remember Frogger well!

I am trying writing the important thoughts by hand in a 3x5 card, a few cards everyday

Here is one:

3x5card_against-smartphone-scrolling_09-14-2023_00.jpeg (203.39 KiB) Viewed 1244 times

[Beany Boo]

My problem is getting rational & helpful ideas from the slow part of my mind into the fast part of my mind

It sounds like you are having regular moments with rational and helpful thoughts but when you fall into that fast brain state those thoughts don’t stick around or take effect. The ideas make sense but you need them to keep up and apply in difficult conditions. You don’t need them to be perfect, just responsive under duress.

[Beany Boo]

Today went well.

It was a day of human frailty and humility.

I definitely communicated better, though I got stuck a few times. Recovery followed on without me really being aware until long after.

I forgot to be a perfectionist again today. What’s worse is nothing bad happened from me letting stuff go wrong.

I think my cause is ‘do less’. I’m sure it’s more sophisticated than that. ‘Do less’ is what it looks like at the coal face.

I caught my own self being optimistic today. It was embarrassing but it didn’t last long so, maybe again tomorrow?