YOU ARE NOT ALONE - A companion online community discussion board for The Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast with Paul Gilmartin

I read a lot of books and listen to a lot of podcasts, and sometimes I cring when I hear people say being happy is a choice. Is it really? In some ways, I can see where it is, but sometimes I'm a doubting Thomas. Are some of us, especially the ones like myself who have opted for some medication, really just not choosing joy? Why do these motivational authors and spiritual teachers not admit that some people might need medication? It always makes me feel a little weak when I hear that being happy is a choice. Intellectually, I know that is false to feel that way, but it is just an initial thought I sometimes have.

Being happy is not a choice...if I could will myself to be happy, I wouldn't be on 3 drugs, in therapy, or a fan of this podcast. Anyone who says that does not understand mental illness. They couldn't possibly. Intellectually, I know I should be happy but The Sad (as I call it) won't always let me.

Now, I personally think that doing something about it is a choice. (In most cases anyway, really severe depression is probably an exception.) You can stay in bed all day and wallow in self pity (and I've done that plenty a time!), or you can choose to put on some pants and face the world. Whether it's talking to a friend, talking to a therapist, or taking drugs, there's got to be some option available to help make yourself better. And you can choose either to do something about it or not. I don't think it will fix itself if you don't try, so there is some choice in becoming happy. But trying doesn't always make it so.

Hi Inmymind

Peace is something you can find although is is not easy (I'm still trying), I find peace when I'm in the midst of my beautiful Welsh countryside. Happiness comes in flashes for me it's never been a state of mind, if someone I love is happy that is infectious, listening to certain songs, being beside the ocean, seeing new countries, taking a great photo can make me happy. I would find people or activities that make you smile and work from there. I, like you don't think I can just be happy I need people or stimulas to achieve that...

Obviously it's not within the same reach for everybody, or atleast it doesn't seem so.

The alternative is deciding that you have no choice.