Turns out this scientifically blah blah blah skin care was full of alcohol. Being human, it dried out my skin.
(Self pride, coming up!)
I learned to listen to my body (hooray for me!), when it became painful to the touch from all the alcohol.
A few years later I went back there, and tried out my newly-found voice; that is, I "used my words".
Me: I am ready to purchase any men's skincare you suggest, so long as it contains no alcohol.
[Cosmetics] person: Oh wonderful blah blah blah. .... and this has a little witch hazel.
Me: Ah, well for me witch hazel is essentially the same as alcohol. If you can suggest any non-astringent aftershave, I am ready to buy.
[Cosmetics] person: Oh, well *this* witch hazel is different, and there is just a little bit...
After that I tuned out, politely excused myself and used my agency to find alcohol free aftershave elsewhere.
So, to recap, in this story I listened to myself, used my voice, used agency, and kept acting until I got my needs met. Hooray for me! Self pride.
(btw, this experience gave me an extremely poor view of high end cosmetics, particularly "anti-aging" frauds. I am astounded that high end cosmetics producers can sleep at night. They create aging anxiety, then supply a worthless "remedy". Fuck them.)
Self love:
Sometimes modest achievements are a big deal for me to accomplish.
During this second summer in a row of emotional hell, a big deal for me to love myself is to apply my alcohol free aftershave, and put a small amount of regular aftershave (think Old Spice) on my pulse points.
This is what passes as an achievement for me these days.
Still, self love!
