How *I* feel right now?

[Cami]

I'm in pain. Sudden back pain since Monday morning, right side of my back is so tight it hurt getting out of bed this morning.

I'm overwhelmed. I have a long dag ahead of me, fixing the apartment and getting ready for birthday dinner tonight (for myself).

I'm annoyed. Because my inlaws wouldn't agree to not celebrate my birthday, even though it was two months ago.

I'm depressed. It's spring now, and it's gotten a little better. Yesterday was a good day, the black mood didn't creep up on me until after dinner. That's a personal best since I don't know when.

I'm anxious. That's just what I do, whenever we are having people over.

It's 07:37 and I am so not up for this day.

Sorry to dump my shitty feelings here, but this is my safe place. I don't know anyone in real life I can be this candid with.
I hope you guys have a better day than me. If you wanna whine too, I'd love to hear.

<3 /Cami

[brownblob]

You can always dump here. I hope you have some better days soon.
As for my whining, I wake up at 3AM every day and can't get back to sleep. I spend every day exhausted from the lack of sleep. On days I work, I struggle just to stay awake in the afternoon. It's getting to a point where I think the exhaustion is overtaking my depression. Throw in that the antidepressant makes me tired and I'm just dragging myself through my days.

[Cami]

Hi Brownblob. Thanks for chiming in! I hope your day isn't too shitty.

[oak]

Happy birthday.

I am glad, sincerely, you made it through the day. Back pain is the worst, and a day can look very long indeed at 7:37 am.

Many a truth is spoken in jest: http://www.theonion.com/article/area-ma ... h-day-2426

You mentioned a mood that creeps over you at night; I had some sort of depression-type experience last year, usually in the late afternoon, and I could tell the exact moment it would start: I could feel it, like a perverse, awful ASMR: I could feel the sadness and heaviness start at the top and my head and radiate down. Maybe that is similar to what you mention.

I say the following sincerely, also: I hope the next year of your life is 1 to 5 percent better than last year. Maybe we can hope that things will be 100% or 1000% better, but sometimes not-getting-worse is the best we can do.

[Cami]

Hi Oak!

It's currently 05:49 (AM!!!!) and I'm up and eating my eggs with the same backpain, before heading to work.

Thanks for the article, I shall read it and be inspired once I'm on the train!

The afternoon meltdown is a well known advesary in my world, it has visited me regularly for at least a decade.. Yay for things that are consistent, I hate when people move my cheese.

[ladysquid]

I'm sorry you feel shitty but I just wanted to offer a virtual hug to you and your sad emotionally eating panda. I wish my lumpy bunny and her could be friends.

...and never feel bad for dumping here. It's pretty much what we're all here for.

[Cami]

The emotionally eating panda is my spirit animal. At least your bunny looks kinda chipper.

Hugs right back at you!