YOU ARE NOT ALONE - A companion online community discussion board for The Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast with Paul Gilmartin

All excellent ideas from our friend Heather. Be sure to come up with a plan, however provisional.

Good luck this weekend. We’re pulling for you!

If it makes you feel any better, I will be very disappointed if you don’t have a good time this weekend. Also, I will do my best to ignore your real feelings, just so you can have a familiar experience. That said, if you share what is happening for you this weekend and your vulnerability burns me, I’ll manage.

Feel free to eat what you want and dress however you like, in front of whoever’s watching.

If people talk over or look through you, use Paul’s go-to and ask them to ‘go fuck themselves’. If they look at you like your crazy; savour it.

This is as a dude, but the only bandaid I can really offer is to recommend watching the French language film, “Portrait of a Lady on Fire”.

Hello Rivergirl,

This BBS isn't real-time by any stretch, but you remember when they'd "synchronize their watches" in the old movies?

Maybe we all can do that here, and check in on you at a certain time over the weekend to buoy your spirits...

Sounds crazy maybe.... but what the hell....

Wishing you the best!

SD

An excellent idea.

I’ve made a note to check in Sunday morning.

Hello friends,

I don't know how to express how touched I was to read your messages about my weekend.

One of the employees I supervise has been taking a lot of time off since her father has been in a local hospital battling Covid the past few weeks. He passed away on Thursday, so between that and the national news it felt more somber in the office yesterday. It feels like there's so much sadness in the world right now, but I'm grateful for the kindness that also exists.

I do have a provisional plan, starting with going to the big box store that I usually avoid to look for less expensive prescription glasses this morning, buying a sympathy card for work, getting groceries, etc. But I'll try to incorporate something lighter. The weather has cooled off and I'm inspired by your suggestion, Heather, to walk from the big box store to a little cafe I used to go to where I can sit outside and have the kind of frivolous coffee drink that I rarely order. I'll admire the baristas for you, Oak, and practice not caring how people look or don't look at me, Beany.

I hope everyone is having a good/productive/non-productive but restful/tolerable or whatever you would like it to be weekend. Thank you, snoringdog. It feels good (if a bit scary) to be seen and acknowledged in this way.

rivergirl

Hello Rivergirl,

Good to hear you have a plan.
We'll be checking in on Sunday am for a report.
(This is not meant as pressure in any way )

It's easy to get caught up in the "Gotta Gotta Gotta" mindset, right?
I know I do. Relates to my anxiety, (unwarranted) guilt feelings and low self-esteem I think.

Last week I took time to watch a concert recording of Santana & John McLaughlin, which I haven't done in a long time. It was nice to get absorbed for awhile.

Be well...

I hope your weekend is going okay Rivergirl.

Very good River girl!

I am proud that you took action to make a plan.

We’ll look forward to updates, when you have time.

Thank you all for checking in with me. I feel a little ashamed that I haven't managed to beat this weekend thing by now, like why are weekends so much harder for me than I presume they are for most other people? I'll try to report this evening on how it went.

Brownblob, I appreciate your message so much, especially knowing things haven't been so good for you recently. How are you doing?

Oak, thank you for being so reliable and checking in as you said you would.

Snoringdog, thank you for your message and for the Smilie band.
I thought I remembered seeing Santana perform with The Beach Boys when I was in high school, and had to look it up to see if that was possible. My memory was correct ... it was an all day Bicentennial concert on July 3, 1976 with The Beach Boys and America. Amazing that Carlos Santana and John McLaughlin are both still out there touring.

I feel like I've probably used up my quota of posts about myself already these past couple of weekends, but here's my "weekend report":

Yesterday was better than usual for a Saturday, and I think that was largely due to the encouragement I received here. Again, I feel a bit embarrassed about this whole situation, but I woke up with less of a sense of dread on Saturday morning and didn't feel as lonely throughout the day.

I did get in a walk between the big box store and the cafe yesterday, but the cafe was closed, perhaps permanently. I got my other errands done, emailed my cousin, and watched SNL last night with my mom. I mostly had a respite from my recent negative weekend feelings, and I'm grateful for that.

Today was more difficult. I blame myself for that since I didn't make a definite plan for the day, stayed up too late last night, and looked at news and ads for places to live first thing in the morning (both activities that tend to increase my anxiety). Since I have a 3-day weekend coming up next, I'm going to make a strong effort this week to follow healthy habits and to make a definite plan for the weekend. I don't know for sure that it will help, but I want to take the steps that are within my control.

Thank you all again for listening and for the support.