Shrinking

[ladysquid]

My anxiety is gone. My rage is gone too.

Now when I wake up and go to work I am no longer filled with urgency to escape. I'm not busy thinking and planning and trying desperately to change myself. Now when I look for jobs it's like staring at a blank screen. I can't picture myself anywhere. Instead of anxiety pressuring me to change my situation I've accepted it but I don't feel peace. I just feel dead. Blank.

I can't be around anyone. I'm shrinking away from my only friend and my partner. I just want to be left alone. I don't feel despair, I just feel numb. I wish the people around me would let me disappear.

[Beany Boo]

ladysquid,

Good afternoon

Wait five minutes and see if you can feel numb for that long. If something comes up and distracts you or you can't sustain it that's okay.

People can't see into you and they don't hear what's happening inside you while you speak; they don't hear it in your voice. They can't read your secrets from that and you wouldn't give consent for that anyway.

It's okay to feel afraid even without knowing why, or why you're overwhelmed. It's not okay that this is happening to you.

Keep posting, this is vital stuff.