YOU ARE NOT ALONE - A companion online community discussion board for The Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast with Paul Gilmartin

Hi friends.

Inflation is pushing me towards losing what quality of life I have.

My current employers are good men. And my raise in 2021 was not nearly enough: it was a defacto paycut of 5%. This is not sustainable.

There is ample evidence this year's raise will *not* match 2022's inflation. (Remember that inflation compounds: while I was hired at a good wage in 2020, I am already behind from 2021, to say nothing of this year).

My annual review is in early November, which sounds like a long time off, but isn't.

It behooves me to build my skills in the next six months. I'm increasingly sure I can't survive on 2% raises.

I'll have a flurry of posts here this month, in April, as I organize my thoughts, then a few in the following (summer) months, then more closer and during the difficult November meeting with my supervisor.

In the next day or two I post about how I came to this understanding. Thanks for listening.

What precipitated this:

1. I felt guilty today for buying groceries.

This can't continue.

(I have a few luxuries, such as $68/month for Latin dance lessons, but otherwise I live a frugal life.)

I work 40 hours a week. This can't continue.

2. I found out our 2022 raises won't match inflation.

This month (April) I think about, and make preliminary plans, for what I want my life to look like when I have my annual review in November.

When they hired me, 1.5 years ago, they said my new department was like a family.

That was demonstrably false.

My co-workers treat me far better than my family of origin.

To wit:
As demonstrated above, I am being crushed by inflation. I knew I had to say something to my boss during our regular one-on-one Thursday.

I did, and it went great.

Me: While I know the 2% raise you gave me was the highest you could, it was still an effective 5% pay cut, due to 7% inflation in 2021.

My supervisor: That is true.

Did you see the one thing that happened there, that rarely/never happened in my family????

We focused on one specific, measurable, objective thing that happened, and that event was awknowledged.

So many people in my life subscribe to the mentality of "If we don't talk about it, it didn't happen, and if it didn't happen there is nothing to talk about".

I can get used to such refreshing honesty. It doesn't give me another cent, but at least a difficult truth is bravely admitted.

I could get used to this.

When I was contemplating a job change last year (and eventually did it), I had feelings to guilt because the people I worked for were great and I knew they would struggle in some areas without me. However, there was no raise in sight and no chance to move up in the company.

I talked to my therapist about this and she said I feel that way because I'm a decent human...but I need to put myself first. There will never be a "good time" to leave that company. They will get along without me. And if my bosses truly care about me, they will understand and support my decision to leave.

These words helped me get through the decision to change jobs. I hope maybe they will help you as well to put yourself first in decision making when it comes to work, Oak.