YOU ARE NOT ALONE - A companion online community discussion board for The Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast with Paul Gilmartin

"Call on heaven, and row away from the rocks." -Hunter S. Thompson (attributed)

Advice from a new friend

I made friends with the older gentleman who works at the dollar store. Discussing career, I shared that I am 46, and I am white-collar paycheck-to-paycheck/working poor. He was downsized, about five years ago, for younger/cheaper replacements in his fifties.

Knowing what he has been through himself (and demonstrating considerable good cheer about it), I explicitly asked for his advice, and here is what he told me:

"At 46, take a year or two to fix whatever you need to fix, then make a career move within a very few years to mitigate the chances of ending up where I ended up."

Uncomfortable truths. Or "truths" (?)

Controversial take #1: Ageism is real, and men after fifty can have trouble finding work.

Controversial take #2: Having been to a recent professional conference, our current vendor is actively (and I do mean actively) implementing methods to automate work in my very role. This is actually, currently happening.

Anyone is welcome to offer a hundred genuine examples of how ageism and AI haven't ruined actual people they know. I grant this.

I just don’t want my ability to have shelter and food be reliant on being the exception, finding the loophole.

I’ve seen people try to live by finding the edge-case exception, and it is not for me.

Remembering part two of this thread's title

If I am wise, as HST recommends, I will listen to my friend.

My current career is unsatisfactory: I am at best paycheck to paycheck.

And, having work retail myself for a decade, I have no fear of working in a dollar store.

Here, again, is my friend's advice: "At 46, take a year or two to fix whatever you need to fix, then make a career move within a very few years to mitigate the chances of ending up where I ended up."

For me, that means correct any matters like sleep apnea this year or next, and ramp up my professional skills very soon (eg begin in the next 3-6 months).

If I need to make a career change anyway, why not stay ahead of ageism and AI?

And if ageism or AI end up not being career threats, then I'll be the first person to clearly and publicly admit that I was wrong.

But I don't want to be wrecked on the shoals of ruin for the lack of taking my friend's advice seriously.

If I may, I'd like to define my terms

My cohort

Men who graduated from high school in 1994. At 46, we have about 20 years of working life remaining.

Not perfect, but it gives me someplace to start.

An illustration

Like any plane boarding, there are four groups:

Group A: Already have enough money and are retired (yay!)

Group B: Retire at 66, more or less comfortably. Maybe they retired as late age 70 and by the skin of their teeth, but all of their needs are met.

Group C: Are broke busted and disgusted. Their jobs got outsourced, automated, or otherwise disappeared/had pay cuts. There is enormous suffering here.

Group D: Died (RIP!)

If in 2042 I'm in either Group A or Group D, then I have nothing to worry about.

The question is if I'll end up in Group B or Group C.

(Note: I’d gladly be in Group B. Millions of Americans are going to end up in Group C, and Group C is hell.)

Twenty years will go like that

I vividly remember twenty years ago, friends, because it was my first month of graduate school.

Curing sleep apnea and improving my finances in the early 2020's will go a long way to a happier 2040's.

The next twenty years will go by as fast as the previous twenty years; will I be diligent?

Put a little more concretely (ha!)

https://www.reddit.com/r/IdiotsInCars/comments/xyn9v6/ill_just_completely_ignore_all_of_these_workmen

This fool ignored warning signs, and did things his own way.

Life has given me all the warning signs I need, clearly listed in this thread. Will I be like the fool above, or will I heed prudence?