Therapy Session 10-11-2022
Posted: October 11th, 2022, 5:09 pm
a lot to say, don't have enough time to get into it in detail
[**] I am using the smartphone app "Routinery" to make a routine for emotional work I do before I set off to try to be productive, it is working <very> well, been using it for just under a week with excellent results
[**] sharing grief with all my younger selves, in a circle, holding hands
[**] my depression - I didn't allow my depression to get in the way of being there for my daughter, it would have been nice to offer a version of myself completely without depression, but again <<I didn't allow my depression to get in the way of being there for my daughter>>
[**] My "Ta-Dah List!" on my white board hung on the wall - a celebration of the tasks that I accomplish, i write them down on my "Ta-Dah List!" especially when they have a big emotional component - when I fill this board up I will take a photo of it! maybe I will get some fun stickers too for my magnetic white board
[**] when I am trying to be productive, there is a teenage-aged-self inside me, that is defiant, that enters into "revenge procrastination", that wants to manage my mood with hours of smartphone scrolling - I say to him "You can be defiant, and i will love you exactly the way you are" - this is some powerful stuff, because the exact opposite of what was communicated to me when I was growing up
[**] I tell my 10-year-old-self inside me "You <are> a hard working, and your hard work does not necessarily look like other people's hard work" - this is some powerful stuff, because the exact opposite of what was communicated to me when I was growing up
[**] I am using the smartphone app "Routinery" to make a routine for emotional work I do before I set off to try to be productive, it is working <very> well, been using it for just under a week with excellent results
[**] sharing grief with all my younger selves, in a circle, holding hands
[**] my depression - I didn't allow my depression to get in the way of being there for my daughter, it would have been nice to offer a version of myself completely without depression, but again <<I didn't allow my depression to get in the way of being there for my daughter>>
[**] My "Ta-Dah List!" on my white board hung on the wall - a celebration of the tasks that I accomplish, i write them down on my "Ta-Dah List!" especially when they have a big emotional component - when I fill this board up I will take a photo of it! maybe I will get some fun stickers too for my magnetic white board
[**] when I am trying to be productive, there is a teenage-aged-self inside me, that is defiant, that enters into "revenge procrastination", that wants to manage my mood with hours of smartphone scrolling - I say to him "You can be defiant, and i will love you exactly the way you are" - this is some powerful stuff, because the exact opposite of what was communicated to me when I was growing up
[**] I tell my 10-year-old-self inside me "You <are> a hard working, and your hard work does not necessarily look like other people's hard work" - this is some powerful stuff, because the exact opposite of what was communicated to me when I was growing up