YOU ARE NOT ALONE - A companion online community discussion board for The Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast with Paul Gilmartin

My mental illness takes the form of anxiety and panic attacks. I have also suffered from depression, but the last 5 years or so this seems to be the way it manifests itself in my life.

I was off meds for over a year, feeling pretty good, then I had a couple of weird health issues last month. I had an ocular migraine which required me to go to the ER and have a cat scan - as I was sitting in the examining room talking to doctor after doctor I was thinking "Ok, when's the panic attack coming?" (If you don't know what an ocular migraine is it's when you temporarily lose your sight in one eye.) Then I had a pinched nerve which caused a tremendous amount of pain. When I got that sorted out, I had wicked anxiety one day at my daughter's baseball game. Didn't sleep that night, racing heart, mind going nonstop. Got my doctor to start my Rx's the next day. I'm taking Lexapro and Klonopin and seem to be on the upswing.

What I hate the most is what this does to my self esteem. I feel like such a loser when I go through one of these spells. I hate asking for help. My husband is a doll and is very supportive when I'm going through this stuff. He really tries to ease my burden but I hate feeling helpless.

In retrospect I could see this coming - I had a really busy month in June. Parties for the kids, house league and travel baseball for one of my kids, had some work done on the house, very busy at work, etc. Honestly it's mostly "good" stress but I guess stress takes it's toll no matter what. I think the migraine and pinched nerve could both be a result of stress. I eat pretty well, exercise religiously, try to get a decent amount of sleep, don't drink much or smoke so it kind of pisses me off that I still can't seem to manage my stress. What's up with that?

I'm bummed I had to go back on meds but also relieved that they seem to be working and I'm not experiencing all the crazy side effects like the first time I went on them. I'm only taking half doses right now.

Anybody else suffer from anxiety and/or panic attacks? Any women out there that had this hit them in their 40s? I'm suspicious that some of this is hormonal but my ob/gyn said that is really hard to pinpoint. But he did say that he has a lot of patients my age that suffer from this.

Hey Next Year,

I totally suffer from similar anxiety...although mine comes from a LACK of stress...like I go crazy when i don't have something to focus on. That probably sounds weird, but I think mine might be more of a manifestation of depression. Anyway, I wanted to say that I understand the weird physical symptoms. My brother in law gets panic attacks as well, and, related or not, also has had episodes of Bell's Palsy, which is a pinching of the facial nerve that causes temporary paralysis of one side of the face. In another instance he had called the ambulance during a panic attack because he thought he was having a heart attack (if you have panic attacks you for sure know what that feels like! uuugghh). My mom also gets panic attacks, and went about 30 years without having them until recently! I think it is pretty common in woman your age, especially as you approach menopause (also, keep an eye on that thyroid!). How did the meds work? I'm really interested in going on some for my own anxiety.

Hey MackKnife - read your intro and see you're from WI - I'm a fellow Midwesterner - a "flatlander" from Chicago.

re: meds. My doctor put me on an antidepressant which also works for anxiety. I'm on Lexapro which is similar to Celexa (celexa is available in generic form). I take the Klonopin for immediate relief from a panic attack or anxiety and/or to help me sleep. It is an antiseizure med which also works for anxiety. It's longer lasting than Xanax (8 hours vs. 4 hours) and I believe it's less addicting. Once my Lexapro really kicks in (4-6 weeks?) I will wean off the Klonopin. Last time I went through this I really didn't need it once the Lexapro was working.


I tried other meds. I had taken Prozac for postpartum depression but that left me feeling very "flat." Not happy, not sad, just cruising along. I like Lexapro because I still feel a normal range of emotions - happy, sad, angry, nervous, etc. Just less of the anxiety and depression. I had tried Effexor for anxiety but it kept me up for 2 days so that didn't work. Weird that some of the side effects for these meds are anxiety and insomnia which is the problem I was trying to treat. Sometimes it's hard to tell what's a side effect and what's your own anxiety, so you may have to gut it out for a week or two before the meds kick in.


I would advise working with a psychiatrist (vs. a general practitioner) because they really understand how all these meds work together. The process can take weeks or months finding the combo that works, but it is worth the effort. Everyone responds differently to meds so it may take you a few tries to find one that works. I also think going to a therapist or counselor while you're doing this is really important. My therapist gave me good suggestions on how to deal with my day to day stresses, as well as offering great support while I was going through the whole process of finding the right meds

THanks for the reply.

I really hope that I can just take one (like Prozac), and be done with the trial and error. I am seeing a Nurse Practitioner who is psychiatrically trained (not an MD, but she's pretty good). I saw her before and she didn't want to start on meds right away and just prescribed beta blockers for acute anxiety. They kind of worked, but not really...they only helped with the blood pressure spikes.

Probably talking about this is making me more anxious...almost had an attack last night! Went for a long run and felt a lot better. Dammit.

Thanks for the info. Also, do you, or anyone else feel like you can really manipulate therapists into getting what you want? I feel like i know the keywords that they look for (you know, after reading about all this stuff), and I feel like if i go in there wanting Prozac, I will probably come home with a script. Trying to a avoid that, but I guess I'm such a control freak that I can't imagine anyone knows what is best for me (besides me). Maybe that's perfectionism?

Have you ever been on an antidepressant? If there's one that's worked for you, then you should let your medical provider know. If you've just researched it and want to try Prozac for whatever reason I would just tell them that. There may be newer products on the market that are better. Most providers should work with you. They want to avoid the trial and error too. And sometimes the first thing you try works, so you never know. I guess my main point is to be prepared to give it at least 2-4 weeks before you see the real effects of an antidepressant. Klonopin, Xanax, etc work right away but antidepressants need to build up in your system.