lack of sleep and depression

[jenloiacono]

So I recently started a new job with a drastically earlier schedule.. and I'm having a really hard time adjusting.

I feel incredibly sleep deprived and I think it's making all of my depression and anxiety symptoms much worse..

I'm feeling really overwhelmed and hopeless. I'm also so forgetful that I'm making really dumb mistakes at work.. just on the verge of crying all the time. I'm scared of how much worse it will get if I can't get adjusted and in a better sleep pattern.

one of the ways I've always "punished" myself is by depriving myself of sleep.. so you can see where this cycle is going..

what are your experiences with lack of sleep and it's. affect on your depression..etc?

[apb7721]

I definitely believe there is a connection between depression and insufficient sleep. Once I started sleeping 7-8 hours a night on a regular basis, I did not have as much issue with my random bouts of depression. It's different for everyone but a good sleeping pattern helped me.

[manuel_moe_g]

I suck - I am such a baby, I could do so well with 10 and a half hours of sleep every night, but that is incompatible with my responsibilities. Also, my depression, anxiety, Aspergers is so taxing, one day of action "normal" makes me wish I could sleep for two days straight to recover.

Without the sleep, I am a zombie, and I just succumb to wasting time on the internet, because my mind cannot focus.

Lack of sleep and overeating just kill me.

[jenloiacono]

oh i feel like such a baby posting about this too..

i've been getting less than 6 hours of sleep a night for the past 3 weeks. that sounds so pathetic, i should be able to function on that. but i'm slipping.. my depression/anxiety/inner critic is so much worse, and i'm so forgetful now.. it's bad.

i feel like such a zombie. and i just can't make myself go to bed earlier or make myself sleep in on the weekends. i feel like a waste of space if i'm not up. especially on the weekends, it's like i'm wasting my time off if i'm not awake.

what a fucking first world problem.

[jenloiacono]

even more than not being able to "make" myself go to sleep.it's a combination of me desperately trying to put off the next day as long as possible and feeling like i don't deserve sleep because of whatever i've deemed that i've done wrong that day. blerg.

[weary]

There is definitely a connection. It is one of the terrible dynamics in my life and in my marriage. And then anxiety/anger about lack of sleep can fuel further lack of sleep, which perpetuates the cycle. I regularly get <4 h sleep several nights a week. I used to just crash on the weekends and then feel guilty about not getting up and getting stuff done, just like you said. Taking time for yourself to relax (especially to get sleep) is NOT wasting time - it is something that you need and deserve. If you need to look at it in another way, investing that relaxation/sleep time will make your waking hours more productive.

Try to be kind and compassionate to yourself and remember that getting a good night's sleep helps you in so many different ways. That voice that wants to punish you by robbing you of sleep can be talked back to. I don't know if you have any relaxation/meditation sorts of things that you do at any time of day, but they can be especially useful at night. I feel like somewhat of a hypocrite, because I don't use them as often or as effectively as I could. There is a good little book of meditations called "Five Good Minutes at Bedtime" to give you some ways to try to clear your mind and wind down so you can let go of your day and get rest.

As I am writing this, I realize how much of a terrible problem this is for me and especially for my wife. These things are useful ideas and tools, but they can be hard to implement. Just know that you are worth it and I hope that some of these ideas can help.

[imperfectrhyme]

I've been addicted to Ambien for four years. Luckily, I've never had to increase beyond the recommended dosage, but I know other people can have dependency issues.

Insomnia is a physical symptom of depression. I mean, people can't control their REM cycles. For me, it's been one of the most functionally devastating symptoms of depression.

[jenloiacono]

thank you all so much for your responses, i really appreciate it.

weary: thank you for reminding me that i deserve the rest and that i can talk back to the voice in my head that is trying to punish me. it's hard but i'm trying.

update: not proud of this update.. but it i guess accomplished the goal. if you've read my other posts, you know that i quit drinking a couple months ago.. well, the last couple weeks i decided i was fine, and could start again. this friday, i got incredibly drunk, which induced a two day hangover. i passed out friday night.. so that sort of forced me to get some rest.. and then had a wedding to go to on saturday, went home early and slept pretty much all day sunday. i was still beating myself up about drinking and was a little too depressed to do anything else but nap.. but at least it accomplished getting some rest.

i'm back on the wagon as of saturday.. and back into a non full night's sleep pattern as of last night (3.5 hours).. but i don't think i'll have too many lack of sleep issues from last night as i slept most of yesterday.

just wanted to update and thank you all. wish it was less pathetic, but there it is.

[fifthsonata]

oh yes, there is a strong correlation between depression and lack of sleep.

I know you said that for some reason you believe you don't deserve to sleep - have you thought about taking some homeopathic remedies to help you fall asleep? maybe some intense exercise when you get home?


perhaps if you felt tired enough you would go to bed sooner - if you wear yourself out to the point of exhaustion you might let yourself sleep.

[jenloiacono]

i have thought of that.. but that would mean accepting that i deserve sleep if i'm going to try things that help me fall asleep.

grr. idk. this thought process is so stupid.

i have therapy tonight, but after that.. i am taking your advice and attempting a run to try and wear myself out.