YOU ARE NOT ALONE - A companion online community discussion board for The Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast with Paul Gilmartin

My girlfriend found this very in-depth quiz that takes a lot of what I think is shared in the sexual fantasies section of the "shame and secrets" survey and gets scientific with it! I dunno how open people want to be with this but I found my results to be pretty spot on. I wouldn't say I'm a kink expert but I know myself pretty well and I'm extremely lucky to have a partner that has almost the 100% polar opposite of my results, making us a match made in queer kink heaven. (awww!)

I think this is a neat tool to discover what you might be into and can be used as a jumping off point to talk with your partner about your desires and fantasies!

http://bdsmtest.org is the link!

These are my results - not sure if everyone is as open to share but as my results point out I'm 83% exhibitionist sooooo take it in people, take it alllll in!

== Results from http://bdsmtest.org/ ==
100% Masochist
99% Bondage receiver
96% Degradation receiver
89% Submissive
83% Exhibitionist
81% Brat
78% Non-monogamist
68% Experimentalist
67% Voyeur
45% Primal (Prey)
42% Pet
30% girl/boy
29% Slave
26% Vanilla
10% Switch
10% Ageplayer
5% Dominant
2% Daddy/Mommy
2% Sadist
1% Degradation giver
0% Owner
0% Primal (Hunter)
0% Brat tamer
0% Bondage giver
0% Master/Mistress
0% All-Rounder
See my results online at http://bdsmtest.org/result.php?id=614218

== Results from bdsmtest.org ==
97% Dominant
90% Rigger
88% Brat tamer
78% Daddy/Mommy
71% Sadist
66% Vanilla
59% Degrader
52% Master/Mistress
45% Ageplayer
40% Primal (Hunter)
37% Experimentalist
36% Voyeur
31% Owner
4% Non-monogamist
4% Exhibitionist
4% Girl/Boy
3% Masochist
2% Rope bunny
2% Submissive
2% Switch
1% Degradee
0% Primal (Prey)
0% Slave
0% Pet
0% Brat

99% Masochist
98% Rope bunny
96% Submissive
87% Degradee
75% Primal (Prey)
69% Experimentalist
65% Non-monogamist
54% Brat
49% Slave
25% Exhibitionist
21% Voyeur
19% Vanilla
13% Ageplayer
11% Girl/Boy
8% Pet
3% Switch
3% Sadist
2% Rigger
2% Primal (Hunter)
1% Master/Mistress
1% Degrader
1% Daddy/Mommy
1% Brat tamer
1% Dominant
0% Owner

Seems about right.

== Results from bdsmtest.org ==
100% Degradee
99% Rope bunny
99% Submissive
99% Exhibitionist
98% Slave
93% Experimentalist
90% Voyeur
87% Pet
81% Primal (Prey)
78% Non-monogamist
75% Brat
73% Masochist
62% Girl/Boy
38% Rigger
28% Degrader
20% Ageplayer
15% Sadist
15% Brat tamer
12% Switch
11% Daddy/Mommy
9% Vanilla
8% Owner
8% Dominant
7% Primal (Hunter)
6% Master/Mistress

Yup freaky girl right here

Yaaas

Not surprising a lot of subs up in here - to me it feels like my life is too damn much to control so the last thing I want to do is have to be in control during "play"

I'm definitely not a sub. I have to be in charge at all times. I prefer a very submissive partner.

If this relates to my mental health at all, it could be related to my anxiety. Things that are beyond my control freak me out.

I am really trying to work on my anxiety these days. I hope it gets better, but now I'm worried that I'll lose my dominant side and sex will be less fun.

Not that this is something I have cause for concern about right now, given that my number of sex partners is exactly zero.

Not surprising a lot of subs up in here - to me it feels like my life is too damn much to control so the last thing I want to do is have to be in control during "play"

Yeah, for me I feel like it's one of the only ways I can get out of my head and my anxieties. I mean, I haven't had someone to play with in years, but it's what fantasies will revolve around.

I love givong over control - its one of the ways that I actually have a small amount of power and I can exercise trust an intimacy with a partner - and just feel really focused on and wanted -

its a huge amazing feeling and it does not feel degrading or awful or triggering it feels like I am free and seen.

Sad Daddy -

Being a dom is not a medical issue it means that you enjoy being in charge - being less anxious will not take that away from you - it is a part of who you are - now it may make it so you can have deeper more intimate connections with your partner when you are not worried all the time about all the things that anxiety makes you worry about - finding a good partner to "play" with is really about trust - and finding that partner can cause anxiety - its all inter-related - we are complicated creatures -

But my point is get healthy - it will improve your connections and your desire to be yourself not take away from them -

My sex life isn't exactly booming either even with a partner - getting in the headspace where I even want that kind of attention can be a challenge. But I think either way it's better to know yourself so that when the time comes you can be honest with a partner and get what you need.