Love, Loss, and Loneliness
Posted: December 24th, 2012, 6:47 am
I just thought that this would be an appropriate place to share the poem that I referenced in my introductory post. If you want more context, feel free to read that post, but the short story is that I wrote this a year after my first girlfriend was hit and killed by a drunk driver.
I was coasting along
Without a care in my life
It was all just a song
Of sorrow and strife
I was always alone
But nobody cared
If only they'd known
The love that was there
I was strongly convinced
That love was not to be
Because the girls always winced
When they looked over at me
Then out of the blue
I ran into her
Out of whack she threw
The thoughts I thought were so sure
I caught her eye
As she walked over to me
My angel from up high
Her name was Courtney
I found reason to live
Someone who would care
I had someone to give
The love that was there
Each time I heard her speak
With her sweet southern twang
My knees would go weak
And my heart always sang
Late nights we'd talk
And to the future we'd gaze
To the aisle she'd walk
And to our honeymoon days
But that first fall
Of our romantic trek
Her father would call
She'd been in a wreck
My heart quickly sank
And I started to cry
My mind went in the tank
When I thought that she'd die
But I didn't know
What I would soon see
She wouldn't let go
She hung on to me
She still couldn't move
From her waist on down
There was little hope to improve
The doctor said with a frown
But she knew how to fight
To beat all the odds
She showcased the might
Often seen of the gods
She started to move
Then she started to walk
She was able to prove
The doctors were just talk
But more important to me
Our love was still there
It was easy to see
That God really cared
At least so I thought
It was foolish of me
To think I wouldn't get caught
Back up in my misery
Because one night I heard
That my love had gone to heaven
It was December the third
Of two thousand and seven
She was hit by a drunk
And killed on the spot
That night my life sunk
And started to rot
I lost my way
In God and in life
And my every day
Was mired in strife
My friends tried to help
But I pushed them away
When they talked I would yelp
"You don't know my pain"
They wouldn't step back
And watch my despair
They showed me the fact
That they'd always care
With all of their work
I've rebuilt some parts
But I still have the hurt
Of that big, broken heart
Their help means the world
Yet it isn't enough
Because without my girl
I'm not really that tough
So I sit here tonight
Looking over the ledge
Thinking I might
Jump over the edge
But because of all you
I just picked up my pen
There's just one thing to do
And that is to say "The End"
I was coasting along
Without a care in my life
It was all just a song
Of sorrow and strife
I was always alone
But nobody cared
If only they'd known
The love that was there
I was strongly convinced
That love was not to be
Because the girls always winced
When they looked over at me
Then out of the blue
I ran into her
Out of whack she threw
The thoughts I thought were so sure
I caught her eye
As she walked over to me
My angel from up high
Her name was Courtney
I found reason to live
Someone who would care
I had someone to give
The love that was there
Each time I heard her speak
With her sweet southern twang
My knees would go weak
And my heart always sang
Late nights we'd talk
And to the future we'd gaze
To the aisle she'd walk
And to our honeymoon days
But that first fall
Of our romantic trek
Her father would call
She'd been in a wreck
My heart quickly sank
And I started to cry
My mind went in the tank
When I thought that she'd die
But I didn't know
What I would soon see
She wouldn't let go
She hung on to me
She still couldn't move
From her waist on down
There was little hope to improve
The doctor said with a frown
But she knew how to fight
To beat all the odds
She showcased the might
Often seen of the gods
She started to move
Then she started to walk
She was able to prove
The doctors were just talk
But more important to me
Our love was still there
It was easy to see
That God really cared
At least so I thought
It was foolish of me
To think I wouldn't get caught
Back up in my misery
Because one night I heard
That my love had gone to heaven
It was December the third
Of two thousand and seven
She was hit by a drunk
And killed on the spot
That night my life sunk
And started to rot
I lost my way
In God and in life
And my every day
Was mired in strife
My friends tried to help
But I pushed them away
When they talked I would yelp
"You don't know my pain"
They wouldn't step back
And watch my despair
They showed me the fact
That they'd always care
With all of their work
I've rebuilt some parts
But I still have the hurt
Of that big, broken heart
Their help means the world
Yet it isn't enough
Because without my girl
I'm not really that tough
So I sit here tonight
Looking over the ledge
Thinking I might
Jump over the edge
But because of all you
I just picked up my pen
There's just one thing to do
And that is to say "The End"