How to reach out?

[emo]

I need some help. My 20 year old son & his 18 year old fiance are in denial about their mental illnesses. I am worried mostly for my grandson, their seven month old baby. I want them to get help, but I know I can't make them do anything. My son is depressed & has anxiety issues, his fiance has told me that she is bipolar, but is not medicated & doesn't plan to ever go on meds again. They both are heavy marijuana smokers, high school drop outs with out drivers licenses or steady jobs. My son works part time for a friend of his, but no steady income. They spend every dime they get as soon as they can & then bitch about being broke. They live with my ex-husband...it's a very co-dependent tangled web that they live in. I recently bought them some books - one about finances & budgeting, one about depression & anxiety & two about bipolar - one for her & one for him. I know I can't make them read the books, but I feel like it is something I can do to let them know that I am aware of their struggles & can be helpful if they'd let me.
I really would like some help with how to give them the books & what to say when I do give them to them. I don't want to strain our relationship any more than it already is & yet I know it will strain the relationship, these aren't easy people to talk to or deal with . They are very manipulative & I have a hard time dealing with them on the best of days.
Any thoughts would be appreciated!

[CosM129]

Hi

I would not give them the books, the most I would do is whatever you need to make sure your grandchild is healthy and happy. Otherwise take care of you be ready to support them when they are ready really ready but not before. I would also go to a support group for yourself
This is just my opinion but I would put your and your grand child's health and safety first. Hope this helps a bit best of luck ok . Again therapy for you or support group is probably good. Until they want help you cannot do much

[emo]

Thank you CosM129. Unfortunately, I did not read this until yesterday & I gave them the books about a week after I originally wrote about this. Giving them the books was awkward but I did it, with the realization that I could not make them read anything but I did not know how else to be helpful. I do appreciate your response!