YOU ARE NOT ALONE - A companion online community discussion board for The Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast with Paul Gilmartin

What are your views or experiences with exhibitionism, either as a participant or witness. How did it make you feel? Was any harm done? Were there any lasting feelings?

I've long wanted to have sex in public. Somewhere outdoors, maybe. It is something that sounds like fun. The closest I've ever come was giving the guy I was dating at the time a blow job outside of our campus library. It was nighttime and very dark, so no one saw us. The fear of (possibly) getting caught made me so much more aroused. It was great.

I have for a long time would rather casually change my clothes or walk around the house in the nude with the windows wide open. Consciously or unconsciously hoping that someone would see. I sort like exposing myself in that way, not necessarily for arousal but the idea of someone seeing me bare by accident and watch me without me knowing is a turn on. Its like someone sneaking a peak at my soul as I the kind of person that walks around stoic and holding my feelings inside.

I'm the same way, psm45. I like to walk around the house naked, and the fact that someone might accidentally catch a peek is exciting to me. I generally find being in the nude very liberating, like a big fuck you to a society that's constantly telling me I'm not thin, shapely, or pretty enough. It's my body, and it's beautiful in its own way.

I also like having sex in front of windows, though only if they are more than two stories up. Obviously, I don't want little kids walking by and seeing me doing the nasty.

While I am mostly vanilla, I do have a dominant streak in me, I have done subtle things in public that are clearly received and welcomed by the recipient.

Also, since I am okay with PDA, if a first date goes well I like to pin her up against the side of her car as we kiss goodbye. And sometimes I'll pin her wrists above head. Sexy!

oak; yeah, that is hot if you do things like that respectfully and not in, say, the middle of wal-mart parking lot....it can be very sexy. I don't see that as exhibitionism, though.


personally, I had a guy flash his dick at me when I was going in to work. he untied his jacket belt, and at first I didn't think anything of it. I just thought he was untying his jacket. the wind blew it open and he wasn't wearing anything underneath. He didn't even make eye contact with me - he smiled as he was walking by.

I was just weirded out a bit and went inside quickly to be on the safe side. No lasting effects or anything. Just...pity, almost.

flashing and exhibitionism are not the same thing....
one you are forced to be a part of and the other is a choice
and the choice, with exhibitionism, is from what I can tell, part of the fun...

you want to hear about exhibitionism, talk to a toll booth operator sometime.
so many people do the deed while driving or being driven (puns intended if you want) and flashing truck drivers or toll booths
so common, like under the benches at a high school football game or just off the hiking trail and elevators...airplanes, hospital beds, boats tied to the pier, fireworks...

those examples are not quite exhibitionism but flirting with it -
exhibitionism is far more "look at me" than how close can we come to getting caught (and that pun was not intended...)

When I was in college I used to hit the nude beaches when I was home in Long Island NY. Quickly cured me of any body image issues. Of course I was young and skinny and when I walked by the gay beach I got a nice thrill from the older guys checking me out. Now of course I'm one of those older guys.

Since then I've been on the fine line between a naturalist and a full on freaky exhibitionist. I guess there's a time and a place for both I'm the first one out of my clothes when getting it on with my wife. I have this ongoing fantasy of fucking my wife in a hotel room in a big city with the curtains wide open to the world. I have a whole lot of other fantasies involving exhibitionism. But I do keep it all legal.

I have long had the fantasy of exhibitionism, however my job and my wife's job dictate that we be very careful since we have morality clauses in our contracts.

This is an older post but I thought I'd reply anyway. I had a lot of experience with exhibitionism with one of my partners. On a small scale, we would invite people over to watch us have sex. Other times we'd go somewhere public - parks, stores, cars in open spaces during the day. I always enjoyed it and there was no damage. I do have a bit of an ongoing concern about public places. I'd hate to caught or arrested and have something like that in the newspaper. I wouldn't want my children to have to deal with that.