YOU ARE NOT ALONE - A companion online community discussion board for The Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast with Paul Gilmartin

There seems to be fine line between these two things with me. I am so scared of discussing anything that might be sensitive that it ends up feeling like confrontation.

I understand how you feel except this arises mainly with my wife.

For me, the difference is all about intention -- what do you want to get at the end of the conversation? How strongly will you hold on to your beliefs/opinions? Being open and striving to empathize with the other person/people is the epitome of discussion, in my opinion. Wanting only to project your ideas and shoot down any other would be confrontational.

The topic and your relationship to the person/people you want to talk to definitely do matter, but I think it still boils down to what you want to take away from the situation. Paul sometimes talks about the relief he found when he realized that bringing potentially difficult topics up to his wife went much smoother when he stopped trying to "win" arguments and just trying to compromise so they could reach a point that would be beneficial for the both of them. I think that's a good example of making "confrontation" not be negative, because they both know the other person is coming from a place of love.