YOU ARE NOT ALONE - A companion online community discussion board for The Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast with Paul Gilmartin

Every time I get a new email from my Editor or Executive Producer, I get so overwhelmed by what they say even if it is just routine and, I constantly worry if I am going to fuck it up.

Yes. Me too. Every text and every email and every meeting I anticipate being criticized and feeling inadequate.

Feel the same way, dread that little outlook popup each time

I struggle with compliments from my bosses because I'm always paranoid that they are being condescending or if there is underlying, malicious meanings to their words.

I've had this happen. At times, I'll put off reading a particular e-mail because I'm afraid of what it might contain. Sometimes for days, which results in quantifiable consequences from the delay. Frustrating, but even when I recognize it, hard to change it.

And it's sad because even though deep down I know that I am good at what I do I still am so outrageously paranoid.

I experience this anxiety frequently. It doesn't have to be work related at all. There are times when I have to completely unplug from the world for a while because an email, text, or incoming phone call will trigger an avalanche of anxiety.

Since my old career revolved around being available for communication with my boss or my clients on an almost around the clock basis, things naturally didn't go well when this anxiety started manifesting itself.

I will ignore an email, text or social media instant message for days sometimes because of the irrational fear that the message is bringing me bad news or somehow is about how I have disappointed the sender. In fact, I've not checked my voice mail messages in a year.

How do you find ways to manage this anxiety when it manifests itself?

Apologies for the humblebrag.

I fucked up at work back around Thanksgiving, and turned in my resignation. My boss told me that I was "not allowed to quit." One lateral promotion later (into a role that was actually created for me), and I STILL am convinced that he's firing me every time he calls.

Yikes, do I relate to this. I also second guess any response I do give. I constantly think I sound mean when I write emails.

Wow, I sure am glad that "I am not alone" with this. I am always nervous about emails and also voicemail. Like someone on there is going to be really mad about something.....and get me in trouble.