YOU ARE NOT ALONE - A companion online community discussion board for The Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast with Paul Gilmartin

I fear I'm not good at anything
I fear being so physically revolting that I make someone throw up in front of me
I fear not being able to express in words how hopeless I feel
I fear my boyfriend realizing how fucked up I am and sides with the rest of the world in hating me
I fear people finding out I'm a fraud
I fear being stabbed to death
I fear the rain smudging my makeup and looking ugly for the rest of the day
I fear all my hair falling out
I fear cameras and people taking pictures of me
I fear looking in a mirror and have all my confidence shatter
I fear I am not remarkable enough for people to remember me
I fear my mother dying before her right time
I fear social gatherings
I fear talking on the phone in public
I fear this feeling will never end
I fear one day ending my life spontaneously in an inconspicuous location and no one ever finding my body
I fear being deformed by a fire
I fear leaving my bed to face the world
I fear being irrelevant
I fear finally achieving happiness and suddenly be devastated by the news that I have a terminal illness
I fear imperfection
I fear producing hideous/unloveable children in the future
I fear technology taking over the world
I fear a nuclear bomb dropping over the country
I fear small talk
I fear I don't have a grasp of inherent social graces
I fear not achieving anything because my mental illness cripples me
I fear that I'm not a good writer anymore because of my mental illness
I fear that my mental illness has physically corroded a portion of my brain and if you scan it with an MRI, the parts that are supposed to make me a normal human being don't show up
I fear that I am so jealous and resentful towards children I will never be able to have my own
I fear my mom committing suicide if I ever commit suicide
I fear meeting myself someday and absolutely hating the person I am
I fear that I don't have morals at all
I fear that I've become so catatonic, friends and family have given up on me
I fear that if I wait too long to tell someone about my mental illness, by the time I'm ready, they will have stopped caring
I fear that the next time I go to bed will be the last time ever
I fear that someone calls what I'm going through a "phase"
I fear that even my list of my most harrowing fears are not good enough to be featured on the podcast

MiaMichelle wrote: I fear that even my list of my most harrowing fears are not good enough to be featured on the podcast

Don't worry, I don't think Paul goes through and chooses the 'best' ones, I feel like he just chooses them at random!

I can totally relate to so many of these. Oh my God talking on the phone in public, or even just in front of someone... I find it terrifying!

I fear that my mental illness has physically corroded a portion of my brain and if you scan it with an MRI, the parts that are supposed to make me a normal human being don't show up

Holy shit this one is good. Not that the rest of your list isn't, but... this one left me speechless.

I fear I am not remarkable enough for people to remember me

I so feel this. I'm afraid of basically the same thing: being boring and forgotten.