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I need help: time for change.

Posted: October 18th, 2017, 1:06 pm
by oak
My dear friends, thanks to the generosity of Mr. Gilmartin, the admins, and the wonderful people in this forum, you've indulged my many posts. And I am very grateful.

I have something to say, and I need help. This is important for me to say. This is an important topic to me.

After continued and systemic abuse at work, I told my boss today that I am not taking any more abuse.

The every day ups and downs of a job is one thing. The burdens of my current position are a burden on my mental health that I am not willing to accept any longer. Some of you know this has been going on for many months.

This is easy to say, that I will not accept any more abuse, and I meant it and mean it, but now I need to make good on that promise. Since change, to being treated professionally by others, is not going to happen, I am going to fix it by leaving. On my terms, and hopefully soon. I will treat them with the professionalism I've often been denied, but I will leave.

I don't know how I am going to get out of my current work situation, but I will get out. I need your help.

I might reach out to you all for encouragement, and, now and then, if I can be so bold, some accountability.

Re: I need help: time for change.

Posted: October 18th, 2017, 4:31 pm
by manuel_moe_g
oak wrote:After continued and systemic abuse at work, I told my boss today that I am not taking any more abuse.
[...]
[...]I am going to fix it by leaving. On my terms, and hopefully soon.
More self-loving and self-respecting boundaries. This is great stuff, and inspiring too. Your bravery to do right by yourself inspires me.
oak wrote:I need your help.
I might reach out to you all for encouragement, and, now and then, if I can be so bold, some accountability.
We will do all we can, because we love and respect you.

All the best to you on this new adventure.

Re: I need help: time for change.

Posted: October 18th, 2017, 5:47 pm
by brownblob
You are a brave person. Keep taking care of yourself and good luck in your search for a new job.

Re: I need help: time for change.

Posted: October 22nd, 2017, 7:02 am
by oak
Thank you, Manuel Moe and Brownblob, for your very kind replies.

They proved a great help to me, and I specifically remembered what you told me as I was find the courage to have a professional heart to heart talk with my boss on Thursday.

I'm glad my boss and I had those difficult talks on Thursday: we found no common ground on the content/reasons for my discontent, but we shared great warmth and regard in making what is left of my time there as profitable for all parties as possible. There was lots of kindness, respect, regard, and warmth.

Of course, I remain convinced that I've been wronged, and will do everything I can to get out of there as soon as I can, and to my greatest advantage. While still employed there I owe them continued good effort, and two weeks notice. Other than that, I don't owe them anything. This episode taught me my place (ie, very low). I do owe myself prompt, principled action that will maneuver me to tak.e decisive action to get out.

This is a big deal to me, and you can be assured I am very grateful for this thread.