Speaking two different languages

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cry baby
Posts: 10
Joined: November 3rd, 2013, 9:36 am

Speaking two different languages

Post by cry baby »

Does anyone else feel like their spouse is speaking & hearing a different language come out of their mouth? My spouse & I have so such trouble communicating, it's unbearably frustrating. I can say the simplest thing, & it gets completely misinterpreted, starting a fight. I'm so sick of my words being twisted into an entirely different meaning. We are in therapy, but does anyone out there have any advice for clear communication? I try to think things through before i say them, but the conversation often becomes convoluted anyway.
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manuel_moe_g
Posts: 3398
Joined: October 3rd, 2011, 9:04 am
Gender: Male
Issues: Depression, Anxiety
preferred pronoun: he
Location: Orange County, CA
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Re: Speaking two different languages

Post by manuel_moe_g »

When communication is fraught with my wife, I just concentrate on being a repeater, repeating the rational information and the emotional feeling of each thing my wife says. I wish I had more satisfying advice here. Please take care.
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inmymind
Posts: 107
Joined: March 25th, 2012, 5:19 pm
Gender: M
Issues: Depression, anxiety, intimate relationships.
preferred pronoun: He
Location: Southern California

Re: Speaking two different languages

Post by inmymind »

Maybe you are dealing with a wife who has a mental illness too? She's making you crazy, but maybe she already is?
HeathMcF
Posts: 16
Joined: January 9th, 2013, 7:50 pm

Re: Speaking two different languages

Post by HeathMcF »

I've been married 18 years to someone who I struggle to communicate with. We have moments of greatness, majority is good. But there's these valleys of WTF. It's going on a week and we've barely spoken. Going through the motions of a busy happy family. But inside, I just want to cry.

I'm so lonely.

I have suggested counseling, but that isn't something he thinks "we" need. I can go, but he sees no problems with us. There's part of me that knows in 10 years my youngest will be 18 and maybe we just keep pretending until then.

Feeling lost.

Are you feeling the same way? Have you tried to communicate? Practice different approaches?
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