Dear Exposure

[Beany Boo]

At this point, I'll settle for just being without qualifying it at all.

Mmmmm just being...

[HowDidIGetHere]

[rivergirl]

"I want:

Someone to have all the same (or similar) problems as me; mental or otherwise; and for me to accept them in that person, for the purpose of negotiating times to hang out and do fun stuff."

I'm so delighted by this post, Beany.

[Beany Boo]

rivergirl

[Beany Boo]

i want:

To struggle to let others struggle; to manage.

[Beany Boo]

I want:

To realize it quickly, when I'm overreacting; but respond quickly when I realize I'm not.

[Beany Boo]

I got up not feeling happy. I put as little pressure on that as I could. Walking to the train I felt disappointed in each of my colleagues. Eventually it was satisfying. I was honest with one of them who started talking at me while I was very busy. His face didn’t like that at all. I was very comfortable disappointing him though. I had some difficult conversations which I’m proud of. I didn’t enjoy working hard all day. But as long as I kept accepting that I didn’t, I was able to focus. It was great seeing me not pleasing people. That’s the loneliest activity. I let a few things go wrong, or continue to go wrong. Some were big. I just waited for the parts I was responsible for to show up in a form I was entitled to deal with. I look forward to feeling disappointed towards my colleagues again today and not having to show them ‘happiness.’ Today’s goal is to speak as little as possible, let the silences be as awkward as I can stand and to breathe freely while I listen to anything. I can already feel my focus aligning.

[brownblob]

Sounds like you are in control of yourself Beanie. It sounds like you are standing up for yourself and doing what you do and not worrying about what you do not do.

[rivergirl]

Beanie!
So good to "see" you again.

rivergirl