YOU ARE NOT ALONE - A companion online community discussion board for The Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast with Paul Gilmartin

Hey.

Chose this particular subject to get you to know what the post is going to be about, but it’s actually not about me. It’s about my ex. He’s in his 20’s, been depressed for years, and recently it got worse. I don’t want to get into too many details, it’s just that he likes feeling miserable, and he knows about it, so he chooses the worst options for himself in hopes it’s going to get so bad he’s ‘finally’ going to kill himself. The thing is, recently he’s got way too many opportunities to make things worse (and he does), and I’m really scared he might harm himself. I don’t know what to do. We live far away from each other, so all I can do is to talk to him if he feels like sharing these things with me. But he doesn’t listen much. I try to help him, but I’m not sure how.

I’m really scared. Do you have any idea about how to help somebody who enjoys feeling bad?

(he’s obviously not seeing any therapist, he used to, stopped, and now when I suggest it, he starts making jokes about it)

I.

Hello Irri. Please take care of yourself first, and don't be afraid to cut this ex out of your life completely. It is impossible to help somebody who doesn't want to help themselves.

Again, please take care of yourself. You deserve a life without toxic people and without draining people.