My Name is Valerie. I thought I'd open with a Douglas Adams book title. Douglas Adams was one of my first introductions to deep thinking. He had bouts of depression too.
Anyhoo, I have many issues with depression and anxiety. I have overcome many of them without meds (well, legal ones anyway) but have wondered if maybe a small dose of antidepressant could take me the rest of the way out. Strangely, I find myself embracing the low moments as learning experiences, and a time to develop coping mechanisms. I think it has allowed me to be more understanding of other people as well. I was abandoned by my father, and emotionally corrupted by my mother and grandmother. I had a child at 18 and went the adoption route. This has caused many emotional issues for me, hopefully only me and not him which was the point. So far it seems that this is the case. He is happy and healthy, yet I still feel guilty. I have abandonment issues, father issues, control issues, bouts of depression, rejection issues (probably the worst of all). I have felt really down these past few days. Looking for jobs when you have rejection issues will do that. TMIHH has helped me enormously today. I just found it and will always be a listener from this day forward. "you are not alone" is the mantra and it is proven with every story they tell. Keep listening and don't give up!!
Long dark tea time of the soul...
Re: Long dark tea time of the soul...
Hi, welcome!
I feel the same way about my low moments. There is a sort of beauty and grace when everything falls apart and I learned how to be more selfless. But there are things that I could have never learned without being happy and that is how to allow people to love me and see who I really am and how to not feel guilt at things that are not my fault.
I don't think you should feel guilty it is a very brave and beautiful thing to put someone's happiness in front of yours, to do something this selfless regardless of the pain it'll cost you is inspiring. I'm sorry you feel down, it sounds like you've been through a lot. Glad you're here
I feel the same way about my low moments. There is a sort of beauty and grace when everything falls apart and I learned how to be more selfless. But there are things that I could have never learned without being happy and that is how to allow people to love me and see who I really am and how to not feel guilt at things that are not my fault.
I don't think you should feel guilty it is a very brave and beautiful thing to put someone's happiness in front of yours, to do something this selfless regardless of the pain it'll cost you is inspiring. I'm sorry you feel down, it sounds like you've been through a lot. Glad you're here