not great

[ernie]

I hate the phrase "Threatening to Commit Suicide"
It really does stop me from asking for help.
how could I tell my family, my only support system, that I feel suicidal without sounding like I'm holding them all hostage. anything i could think of to say seems selfish, and it seems like whiny bratty behavior.

*groan* this bullshit again? this has been going on for years and it's the same old thing, i'm not learning anything new just circling around the same advice, rolling my eyes.
i can't understand how people survive with these feelings for so long. this is something like the 7th time that i've really felt unsafe with myself, enough to ask for help, but I feel guilty about it, since I've already been through this, for one thing.

[kitkat]

I don't have any amazing advice, but I hope you go to your family and ask for help. It's not selfish and you don't need to feel guilty. If you need help, then you need help and there's nothing selfish about that! Sending hugs your way. <3

[Geek]

I completely understand; I'm having issues with suicidal thoughts today. I don't tell my family got the same reasons. But, I find that venting my frustrations in a support group really helps. And since they've been through the same things, there's no guilt about opening up. It's kinda like Vegas ...what's discussed there doesn't leave the room.

There's no shame in asking for help; don't try to do this on your own. Once I asked for help, things have been better. That's not to say I never have my issues again (today I cried uncontrollably), but I know there's hope.

[ernie]

thank you guys, you know I really appreciate the response.
I moved recently and I haven't gotten settled with any new doctors yet, I suppose that's an actionable thing that I desperately need.. huh.. but of course, like any reasonable experienced person, I have a strong aversion to doctors. So every step of finding an appropriate doctor makes me want to crawl up in a hole..
I've never tried a support group but mentalpod fam has definitely opened up the idea for me. I guess I don't know where to start with that either. Which group do I belong with?! *sigh*
Thanks for the support, hope you're all doing okay today & better tomorrow...

[kitkat]

Every little step helps! I was the same way with doctors, and I still am, but ripping the bandage is so much better in the long run. Of course, I say this, while I have been meaning to go to my first support group meeting for, um, how many months? Haha. Here's hoping we can all push ourselves to getting the help we need!