Hello all!

[cpa85]

Hello everyone. I was looking around for some sort of online support, as it is one of the avenues I've never really used to fight my depression and anxiety. I've been on Lexapro and then escitalopram (the generic) for about 4.5 years, which have been fairly smooth. But in the past week I have been slipping well back into my depression and anxiety. My biggest fears are that I will lose control and that I'll never be able to be normal again. I know I've felt that before and gotten past it, but when I'm deep in the throes of it, it feels all but impossible to overcome. It's scary but I guess that's why it's such a big deal. If it were easy to combat, it wouldn't be such a scary and diffucult situation.

Does anyone have any good episodes to recomment for a newbie? I've heard Paul Gilmartin on other podcasts before, and as insular as the podcast community is (particularly among comedians), I'm sure I'll find many familiar faces in the archives. But I'm curious about which episodes people find particularly helpful.

[manuel_moe_g]

I like the http://mentalpod.com/Alison-Rosen-podcast Alison Rosen podcast because it shows that there doesn't have to be a tremendous trauma for there to be significant pain and a need to seek help.

Please take care, cpa85. You may need your meds altered to achieve the same effect. Also, talk therapy and meds is a wonderful combination - I added Abilify to the Effexor and Neurontin that I was taking, and I started EMDR therapy to make use of the elevated mood from Abilify.

Cheers, cpa85, we here are all cheering for you and for your greatest today and tomorrow!

[cpa85]

I've only been on one medication at a time for my mental health. Do you find having 2-3 at the same time to cause much side effects? I know it's different for everyone, but that does seem a little daunting.

[manuel_moe_g]

modern psychoactive drugs have minimal side effects, as a general rule. But definitely one must listen to one's own body. It is always about benefits vs. downsides. these are also effective and are preferable to medication:

[1] healthy diet

[2] exercise

[3] talk therapy and self-help programs

[4] human connection

[5] one's own effort toward good mental health

In my body, I metabolize pills very quickly and completely, so I am used to medication having a very small effect. so I augment my medications with the above, because I don't have the luxury of relying solely on medication

[cpa85]

In general I find myself to be a lightweight. Cold medicines, alcohol, etc. all have a pretty strong effect on me.

[Chris]

Listen to all of them! Haha. Actually I personally found the co narcissism episode to be really an eye opener for me. I think it's #131.

[cpa85]

I went to the psychiatric hospital this evening for an assessment. I was hoping to get into the partial hospitalization program (which is essentially a few hours of group therapy every day, but not having to stay overnight). A lovely lady did the assessment, was very patient and let me take all the time to say what I needed. They ended up paging my psychiatrist to get his decision and it turns out (as of now) I will not be doing the group therapy program. I will be starting some individual therapy though, and I'm looking forward to getting deep down into my issues. I've been seeing a psychiatrist for nearly five years, but in that time I've never done any therapy at all. The more I was talking about it and getting down to it, the more I realized that was a very important piece of the puzzle I have been missing.

[cpa85]

I've had my first therapy session with my new therapist and I also saw my psychiatrist a couple days ago. The opening therapy session went well, and I am looking forward to my second session tomorrow. Also, my psychiatrist has decided to supplement my 20 mg dose of Lexapro (generic) with a small bit of Buspar. He says there has been some indication that when coupled when people aren't quite getting the full benefit of their SSRI, the Buspar can work as a sort of catalyst to make it more effective.

[cpa85]

Sorry for the extra post (I guess we don't have the option to edit our posts?). I have been doing better overall, but I am still feeling some nagging moments of despair and hopelessness. I understand that when you have a big dip, you won't come out of it in one constant upswing back to "normal". But it's still very frustrating and saddening when my mood fluctuates all day.

[bigeekgirl]

Getting help is in some ways harder, I think, cpa85, than continuing on with our same half-functioning coping mechanisms. The ups and downs are so very hard, but are a part of the process. At least for me, it is demoralizing when I feel I've made a bunch of progress and after days of feeling "normal" I suddenly am blinded by anxiety.