100% Agreement
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ghughes1980
- Posts: 299
- Joined: December 31st, 2012, 1:15 pm
- Gender: male
- Issues: Physical disability, mental disability, depression, anxiety, PTSD
- preferred pronoun: He
- Location: Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Re: 100% Agreement
I'm so tired, I think Michael Jackson was onto something with Propofol. I'd give my nuts up for some restful sleep. These cat naps are kicking my ass.
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ghughes1980
- Posts: 299
- Joined: December 31st, 2012, 1:15 pm
- Gender: male
- Issues: Physical disability, mental disability, depression, anxiety, PTSD
- preferred pronoun: He
- Location: Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Re: 100% Agreement
On Saturday I took part in a presentation on Botox treatment with a panel of doctors from various countries. It was pretty awesome. My treatment team is rolling out an app for patients to use to measure the affects in real time. I'm keen to put that sucker on this device ASAP. What else is there to do late at night?
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ghughes1980
- Posts: 299
- Joined: December 31st, 2012, 1:15 pm
- Gender: male
- Issues: Physical disability, mental disability, depression, anxiety, PTSD
- preferred pronoun: He
- Location: Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Re: 100% Agreement
On top of my regular shit, lately the weather has been super cold. So I'm cooped up in doors most of the time. Winter really doesn't help matters. I'm cutting down on the little exercise I do get because the prospect of -25-30 degrees C is seriously not fun, warm clothes or not. I think it's 2 weeks or so before my next doctor visit. I hope it warms up by then. How's this time of year for you guys? Do you find that depression gets worse? Or do you get a boost from seeing family?
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ghughes1980
- Posts: 299
- Joined: December 31st, 2012, 1:15 pm
- Gender: male
- Issues: Physical disability, mental disability, depression, anxiety, PTSD
- preferred pronoun: He
- Location: Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Re: 100% Agreement
It's been 2 weeks now with a new therapist at the University clinic. I'm still in the rehashing and history phase. It seems to be going well. I qualified for the fee to be waved that's a huge plus. We have started to work in the sessions pretty quickly which is also great. I also have more physical therapy on the schedule so that is great too.
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ghughes1980
- Posts: 299
- Joined: December 31st, 2012, 1:15 pm
- Gender: male
- Issues: Physical disability, mental disability, depression, anxiety, PTSD
- preferred pronoun: He
- Location: Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Re: 100% Agreement
A lot has happened in recent months.
I checked in to the University ER after a serious meltdown in a therapy session. I'm so happy that I had someone to talk to while this meltdown was going on. The councilor stayed with me though the ordeal until my mother was contacted. I don't know what I would have done if I didn't have the therapist to share what was happening. Chronic pain and isolation from depression really sent me into a dark place. I was enrolled in a support group through a referral and I attended my first day on Tuesday. This group is 3 times a week and I will go all three days, EVERY WEEK. New medication dosages and some new sites for Botox injections we shall see how it goes.
I apparently fucked up my shoulder so there's that. There is a tendon in your arm pit that I apparently strained which really effects my shoulder. How about that the small amount of sleep I do get and I can't even do that without hurting myself.
I really want some restful sleep. How do people do this? I'm so tired.
I checked in to the University ER after a serious meltdown in a therapy session. I'm so happy that I had someone to talk to while this meltdown was going on. The councilor stayed with me though the ordeal until my mother was contacted. I don't know what I would have done if I didn't have the therapist to share what was happening. Chronic pain and isolation from depression really sent me into a dark place. I was enrolled in a support group through a referral and I attended my first day on Tuesday. This group is 3 times a week and I will go all three days, EVERY WEEK. New medication dosages and some new sites for Botox injections we shall see how it goes.
I apparently fucked up my shoulder so there's that. There is a tendon in your arm pit that I apparently strained which really effects my shoulder. How about that the small amount of sleep I do get and I can't even do that without hurting myself.
I really want some restful sleep. How do people do this? I'm so tired.
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manuel_moe_g
- Posts: 3402
- Joined: October 3rd, 2011, 9:04 am
- Gender: Male
- Issues: Depression, Anxiety
- preferred pronoun: he
- Location: Orange County, CA
- Contact:
Re: 100% Agreement
Please take care, ghughes1980. Reading your posts it is plain to see you don't deserve this suffering. We here are cheering for you and for your greatest today and tomorrow.
~~~~~~
http://www.reddit.com/r/obsequious_thumbtack -- Obsequious Thumbtack Headdress
http://www.reddit.com/r/obsequious_thumbtack -- Obsequious Thumbtack Headdress
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ghughes1980
- Posts: 299
- Joined: December 31st, 2012, 1:15 pm
- Gender: male
- Issues: Physical disability, mental disability, depression, anxiety, PTSD
- preferred pronoun: He
- Location: Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Re: 100% Agreement
So I've been at this support group for a while and I am running into an issue. I have trouble relating to a lot of the participants because the nature of their injury effects their IQ where mine is mostly physical and I am having to stuff the urge to just scream at some of these people. Their daily problems and complaints are so basic and petty my want to contribute to the group has morphed into just frustration. Seeing that frustration is a major contributor to my depression and anxiety issues how do I keep doing to these meetings and holding these issues of mine in check? I have spoken to the coordinators already regarding this and they haven't been much help. They have suggested that I just hang back a bit when the frustration mounts because everyone has to process their issues in their own way, and I do respect that but it's getting harder and harder to find reasons to even attend. Sitting in the room and doing puzzles because I am able to manage bills and crap neighbors and these bullshit problems doesn't seem like an effective use of my time. If I don't go however I don't have a purpose to get up in the morning, or be effective in self care. I don't have anything else to do. If I stopped attending I would also lose the free talk therapy I get with weekly check ins, and medication reviews etc. Has anyone else run into this sort of thing with AA or NA and how do you keep from just winding up and punching some guy that just doesn't "get it" time and time again?
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irrationalpersist
- Posts: 40
- Joined: June 19th, 2014, 4:19 pm
- Location: west coast Canada
- Contact:
Re: 100% Agreement
It might change your interpretation of your experience in the group sessions if you examine what your expectations are. It sounds like your expectations are not being met, and when that happens, you get frustrated. Is it possible you are perceiving other members in your support group as thwarting your expectations? And that is why you are unable to empathize with their struggles and their journey?
When I attend a recovery support group I hope to hear others' stories of experience, strength and hope. I realize that my attendance is crucial to the existence of the support group - if no one attends, then there is no group. I am grateful for every person who has the courage to get themselves into a chair and stay for the duration. And to keep coming back, week after week.
My attendance at a recovery support group is not contingent on what I can get from the group, but rather, how the group provides me opportunities to grow and to give to those who are suffering. I give my presence, my attention, and my caring. When I do that, my self-centred expectations are replaced with a sense of connection to other human beings. It is this sense of connection, and that there is a 'tribe' that I belong to, that helps me recover from the pain of loneliness, isolation, and alienation. This is the difficult work of self-care, of becoming capable of connecting, of doing the hard work of dissolving my self-imposed thought processes and behaviours that re-instate my own condition of loneliness and disconnection.
As we say in the support groups, "Keep coming back!" When we are judging others challenges and pain, when we are 'taking other peoples' inventories' our attention is not where it needs to be. In those moments we need to be looking at our own thought processes and behaviours and understand why we would obsess about someone else' healing journey and why we feel the compulsion to push others away or bolt for the door.
It sounds like you are in a terrible amount of pain and suffering. I would suggest that you observe how your internal condition dictates what is possible for you to learn, and how that learning, especially in forming new connections with other people, might also alleviate some of our pain.
All the best!
IP
When I attend a recovery support group I hope to hear others' stories of experience, strength and hope. I realize that my attendance is crucial to the existence of the support group - if no one attends, then there is no group. I am grateful for every person who has the courage to get themselves into a chair and stay for the duration. And to keep coming back, week after week.
My attendance at a recovery support group is not contingent on what I can get from the group, but rather, how the group provides me opportunities to grow and to give to those who are suffering. I give my presence, my attention, and my caring. When I do that, my self-centred expectations are replaced with a sense of connection to other human beings. It is this sense of connection, and that there is a 'tribe' that I belong to, that helps me recover from the pain of loneliness, isolation, and alienation. This is the difficult work of self-care, of becoming capable of connecting, of doing the hard work of dissolving my self-imposed thought processes and behaviours that re-instate my own condition of loneliness and disconnection.
As we say in the support groups, "Keep coming back!" When we are judging others challenges and pain, when we are 'taking other peoples' inventories' our attention is not where it needs to be. In those moments we need to be looking at our own thought processes and behaviours and understand why we would obsess about someone else' healing journey and why we feel the compulsion to push others away or bolt for the door.
It sounds like you are in a terrible amount of pain and suffering. I would suggest that you observe how your internal condition dictates what is possible for you to learn, and how that learning, especially in forming new connections with other people, might also alleviate some of our pain.
All the best!
IP
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ghughes1980
- Posts: 299
- Joined: December 31st, 2012, 1:15 pm
- Gender: male
- Issues: Physical disability, mental disability, depression, anxiety, PTSD
- preferred pronoun: He
- Location: Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Re: 100% Agreement
This would probably fit in the depression section but I've got this one to type to. Here goes:
I'm sick of people and their seriously petty problems. I can't see a end to issues with one of the people in my support group. The problems they have are starting to involve me and I'm sick of facilitators coming to me with problems this person seems to have transferring onto me. These are obviously problems in their regular life and they feel that I can be used as a punching bag when the real issue should be solved outside the support group setting, rather than manufacturing a problem with me that mirrors their every day life. I'm also a bit pissed that the facilitators can't see this. It's obvious to me because their weekly reports on Mondays always involve people they live with and how much their living situation bothers them or what other people do to them (perceived or real). All they are doing is taking that same anger and shoving it on me. Has anyone else had an experience like this in a support group? Or is this unique to mental health support groups not dealing with addiction?
There seems to also be an heir of entitlement since they have been in the group longer. Which I don't get. This is not a job they have no power over me so why do they insist on me being flexible to they needs 100% of the time. I'm not actually doing anything to them. Their issues aren't real, I could give two shits if they even show up. I've stopped giving feedback to them, I've done what I can to stay away from commenting on their crap. Yet they still find something I did to them at least 1/3 days this group meets. I'm at a loss. Should I call them out like the freaking wild west in front of the group to get them to stop? Somehow that doesn't seem like a problem solved rather a problem made worse.
I've already voiced this to the main facilitator. Yet ever week I get a chat: "Remember ... is coming back Monday she's got issues with your existence tread lightly." It's maddening!
I'm sick of people and their seriously petty problems. I can't see a end to issues with one of the people in my support group. The problems they have are starting to involve me and I'm sick of facilitators coming to me with problems this person seems to have transferring onto me. These are obviously problems in their regular life and they feel that I can be used as a punching bag when the real issue should be solved outside the support group setting, rather than manufacturing a problem with me that mirrors their every day life. I'm also a bit pissed that the facilitators can't see this. It's obvious to me because their weekly reports on Mondays always involve people they live with and how much their living situation bothers them or what other people do to them (perceived or real). All they are doing is taking that same anger and shoving it on me. Has anyone else had an experience like this in a support group? Or is this unique to mental health support groups not dealing with addiction?
There seems to also be an heir of entitlement since they have been in the group longer. Which I don't get. This is not a job they have no power over me so why do they insist on me being flexible to they needs 100% of the time. I'm not actually doing anything to them. Their issues aren't real, I could give two shits if they even show up. I've stopped giving feedback to them, I've done what I can to stay away from commenting on their crap. Yet they still find something I did to them at least 1/3 days this group meets. I'm at a loss. Should I call them out like the freaking wild west in front of the group to get them to stop? Somehow that doesn't seem like a problem solved rather a problem made worse.
I've already voiced this to the main facilitator. Yet ever week I get a chat: "Remember ... is coming back Monday she's got issues with your existence tread lightly." It's maddening!
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ghughes1980
- Posts: 299
- Joined: December 31st, 2012, 1:15 pm
- Gender: male
- Issues: Physical disability, mental disability, depression, anxiety, PTSD
- preferred pronoun: He
- Location: Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
Re: 100% Agreement
Weekly talk therapy starts for me again Tuesday. In addition to the support group meetings I hope I can get some serious work done for the next 6 or so months. It's a bit of a shame I couldn't get the same person as last school year but people graduate and move on it's fact and that's fine. I'd urge everyone who is looking for low/no cost therapy to check out your local University or College they may have a clinic setup with students donating their time.