brownblob

[brownblob]

Feeling very low today. Crying. The future looks bleak like all my best days are behind me.

[Beany Boo]

That's a view of the future that comes naturally with age. Today you might be in need of first aid while you're in a medication transition. Be ready to sound the alarm if you need assistance. Crying is allowed, even in a crisis.

[brownblob]

thank you Beanie

[brownblob]

I called in to work today and stayed home and cried. I have been at my job for almost ten years and I now question my ability to do it or anything else for that matter. I'm hoping that it's part of the withdrawal from the med I was on and not evidence that the med was working and now that I'm weaning off it I will sink into a crater.

[Beany Boo]

I accept that you feel afraid you're not going to make it through this situation. Go through it anyway. You're in adaptive overdrive right now; something unexpected will happen.

I know you want this to be resolved on a schedule that isn't at odds with work. Your abilities are still there; they've just gone offline while you cope with this significantly difficult medication transition.

It is probably withdrawal. The old pill was probably giving benefits. Give the new one a chance to kick in. You may fall into a crater.

Keep making choices; show your mind you're willing to adapt to even the heaviest shit that's come along so far. Just keep making choices, whether they are good or right, or not. Brush your teeth, tie your shoes, put the dishes away.

It kills me that you're in danger like this. Get emergency help if it gets too much.

[rivergirl]

I just read your post, brownblob. I'm so sorry and sad that you're going through such a low. Please don't tell yourself that this is your fault, or that it's wrong to cry or take off from work or do anything else that you need to in order to get through this time. Your mind and body are probably exhausted from trying to deal with the medication change. As Beany says, please do get emergency help if you feel unsafe.

[brownblob]

I just wanted to stop in and say I am doing well. I switched meds back in February to Lamictal and I've been doing much better. I'm functional and have more energy and can cope with things better. My shrink still wants me to be some smiling shiny happy person and I've never been that but I am doing well. I've been taking a break from listening to the podcast and listening to my music again instead. I have the desire to come back and delete every post I ever made. I'm embarrassed at all the crap I posted. I hope everyone is doing okay. Take care all.

[oak]

Thanks for posting.

I'm glad things are better for you.

You are welcome to delete your posts, though I must admit they've brought me a lot of joy.

[hobojungle]

Thanks for checking in bb, you have been missed.

[rivergirl]

brownblob! I'm glad you are ok.