Mind Body and Trauma

[rivergirl]

Oh my God, the situation with Joe's uncle. I have no words. I don't want to distract from your story, but just to let you know that I may understand to a small degree. I have a violent felon in my family that I never want to see again, and it's divided some of my cousins because some still have contact with him in prison.

Just know that we are with you in spirit as you go through this. And post any time if it helps at all.

The mockery about your kindness to your duck friends makes me feel angry! I know that as Beany said these people are probably projecting feelings that have nothing at all to do with you, but it still makes me want to give them a talking to.

So what if you're a duck mom? I think that's awesome!

Hugs,

rg

[Mental Fairy]

Thank you all for your feedback.

I went over to my brothers this avo to see him and just get some air. I walked in and there on the deck is six baby chicks!!! It seems my brother and I have more in common than I thought! He’s raising some for laying eggs.

I popped in too see my son as he’s working Sundays for extra money. Just wanted a hug.

Rivergirl, so so nice to hear you have similar understanding on the criminal side. I know it’s something we all wish we didn’t have. However this has been an upcoming release we didn’t think would actually ever happen.

Mixed emotions currently and feel myself slipping a little.

Mental hugs

[oak]

Mental Fairy! Thank you for sharing. I’m glad you’re hanging in there. Keep us posted, my friend.

Feel free to share photos of the cute ducklings. (Edit to add: oh, they’re baby chickens. Still, feel free to post photos, if you get a chance!)

Though this doesn’t have anything to do with anything, here goes:

My work has a month-long gamified walking app called “Walktober”, where we are rewarded by earning virtual “leaves”.

One of the images they used is Lake Wanaka. It is beautiful. The app says it is on the South Island.

Also, because it is so awesome, here is an iconic standard, “The Autumn Leaves”:

https://youtu.be/0SZmKJgx0hU

[Mental Fairy]

Morning Oak

Lake Wanaka is beautiful. Used to pop over there every few weeks for climbing when we lived in Dunedin.
It’s a place of peace and beauty.
Had a body massage done there once and I came out of the clinic looking like I have been attacked my a steam roller, hot flustered and bruised.

Back to work now team.
Thinking of you all

[snoringdog]

Hello Mental Fairy,

I'm glad to see your post. I was a little worried- it seemed like you'd been rocked back a bit by the treatment at your neighbor's house, and the news of the in-law's possible release.

Hope you're sleeping better and are finding ways to "keep calm and carry on" as they say.

SD

[Mental Fairy]

Hey Team

Currently sitting in bed breathing a sigh of relief this week is over. Had some tough cases and sadly lost two patients.
The main thing is they knew they were cared for every step of their journey.

The boys have left for the weekend to have some time away. I am not keen on going anywhere so home is where my ducks are!
Had two days of the girl duck yelling for her mate. Finally he returned and all way quite again.

Joes changing jobs as he’s deeply unhappy in the last one of 9 years. I’ve noticed we are drifting apart a bit and I think it’s more so as I’m battling in my own mind about being worth all the effort! Health is ok, bowel is semi stable. So careful with what I eat. Running is going well. Another half marathon this Sunday.

I had an interesting encounter on Wednesday, patient presented with complex medical history. Problems with bowel, ongoing bloating, pain, bleeding from rectum. Told to stop eating gluten, sugar, dairy and so on. Developed eating disorder, now on deaths door to scared to eat. Her medical outcome was found to be similar to mine, sadly her mental health has taken a toll.
Today I had to call her with some results and I explained how her history was similar to mine. We spoke for ages, we both heard each other out and we both understood the struggle. We made a connection many wouldn’t understand and we both said it felt refreshing knowing we truly heard each other.
It’s all very well talking to someone about a journey of struggle but when the people really understands and reflects back in terms you yourself haven’t thought of, it really hit a mental cord. Every word sinks in, it ripples and it reflects back your own struggles are actually real and not in your head.

I’ve also made a new friend whom understands my upbringing. We crossed paths November last year, and have again recently as we have ended up working together most weeks. Knowing the upbringing was so similar but mine not so violent. My fathers circles of friends were very much the same as theirs. The battle this person faces is also night terrors, recovery from alcohol and many other things I am yet to understand more.

Well beautiful people I must get some jobs done and hide the house keys so I don’t wonder away in the night. My sleep walking is nerve racking when ya alone!

[manuel_moe_g]

Hello Mental Fairy!

Glad you found two people who could validate your experiences and situation.

Sorry to hear you lost two patients.

All the best, take care!

[oak]

Yes, agreed with our good friend Manuel Moe.

Also, good luck with your half marathon, Mental Fairy.

Please consider listening to some Teskey Brothers or Black Pumas while you run.

Let us know how everything goes.

[rivergirl]

Hello Mental Fairy,

I've thought of you every day this week and was saying my secular kind of prayers that you were finding some kind of physical & mental relief from recent events.

I'm sorry about your patients. I have a hard time with the turnover of staff at work, but actually witnessing the passing of your patients must be on another level.

So glad you found a couple of people to connect with. I was watching a bit of a trial last night and in one of the victim's statements she said that listening to the other victims testify was like listening to herself. Even with those who are very empathetic, there's nothing like sharing with someone who experienced the same things you did.

I hope you stay safe this weekend, mentally & physically, and that your alone time is soothing.

rg

[Mental Fairy]

Oh rivergirl and oak thank you.

Today was I challenge I accepted with my legs! The mind needed regular tune up.

I gave my body the sleep I needed. I had carb loaded dinner last night, balanced and portion sizers sorted down to the gram.

Got up and got the morning peanut butter toast in and a coffee or two. Headed out the door knowing this could be the hardest half marathon yet.

I follow my gut feeling with running, I know this sounds odd but i take the time to run the route in my head about three times before I leave. I plan the four quarters of the run, first quarter is gentle and mindful. Second is a little quicker but steady, third is focused and mindset really kicks in then the last is determined and structured. Eyes up, chin leading and slight forward pace arms in correct position. Time was 2 hour 17min. I aim for a sub 2 hours one day.

Mindset was key, i listened to the body and made it. Still self doubt was there, negative self talk and the bloody sun came up.
The moment I could be seen by others the talking in my head started.
I did all I could to talk back to it and became more focused on the body than the mind.

Again you all came into my mind along the way. I like to dedicate distance to each one of you that have got me thus far.

I have noticed some old traits coming back to deal with things and I’m not sure how to handle it, seeing therapist on 4th but deeply concerned about being so bloody honest. It’s make you feel so vulnerable and weak. Shame, a huge amount a shame.

I feel very disconnected from husband, more so now than ever. Joes going back on the road long distance next Tuesday.

I feel some anger, a little rejected, and lost.

Better get a wiggle on, getting the air fryer out for dinner Oak!!
Rivergirl I would be there in a heartbeat if I could. SD, your insight floors me at times. Manuel Moe, your journey with grief is familiar and difficult it worth it. Duck1 I’m glad your on board the good ship Mental. Beany you have really made me think over the last few days about knowing your limitations. That’s really made me think so much, especially with the out of control. I hear you.

Mental