2023 plans: December bookend.

[oak]

Friends!

I'd like to post this month about my goals for next year.

There is more I'd like to say, but I am sad and tired from a downer of a week.

With your kind indulgence I'll most more here throughout this month.

For now, I just want to get this idea out of my head and into the objective reality of this forum.

Thank you for listening.

[Mental Fairy]

Hi Oak

I hope you are feeling a little if not more than a little better today.

Your goals i would like to hear about, as i have not set any but am worried if i do, i will let myself down. I seem to have a habit of doing that.

[oak]

Hi Mental Fairy! Thank you for your post

Your goals i would like to hear about...

Sure!

My main goal

My main goal has several subsidiary or supporting goals.

My main 2023 goal: dinner at 5:15 pm each night.

This necessitates a 100% work from home position.

This implies that I have someone to share it with, someone feminine (see below).

This also implies dinner being a small, vegan situation before I go to yoga or martial arts in the evening.

Supporting goal #1: Compete in the November 2023 strength competition.

This also implies flexibility and nutrition (see above!).

Though I wholly do fitness for me, I have noticed young ladies noticing me (see below!)

Supporting goal #2: Spend time around feminine energy

Happy little update: For the third time in my life I received a compliment about my looks (many men go a lifetime without a compliment): an acquaintance told me that I am "easy on the eyes".

I am working with my mental health counselor, this week, on preparing a script to invite out young ladies.

I mention this because I've been flirted with twice in the last two months, unambiguously, and was so astonished I totally shut down.

(Note: I don't pursue women. Both found ways to chat me up. And I just froze both times.)

Next steps, for this month

I think these efforts (kettlebell "rack and jerk" motions and inviting out young ladies who give unambiguous signals) deserve their own thread.

... as i have not set any but am worried if i do, i will let myself down. I seem to have a habit of doing that.

Maybe you can consider the following, my friend?

What is your 2023 plan for ducks?

In honor of my plant-based efforts, did you try giving them celery?

Can you order a duck-shaped cookie cutter, and then give the resulting cookie-ducks each a Christmas hat-icing?

https://www.amazon.com/Rubber-Duck-Cookie-Cutter-Plated/dp/B07C7Q7GTW

I ask you (kindly), Mental Fairy: what is your duck plan?

[Mental Fairy]

Hehe hi Oak, love the duck ideas!

When we get smear test results for patients we always send them a little letter of good result and their next appointment. I have started putting duck clips on the appointment cards and have had a lovely reaction!

I am going to build them a little home away from home next year. They have a safe space currently and use it. But feel I need to do more! That’s just me.

My cat also will have a new kitty tower I want to build myself.

Next year I am nervous about, why I’m not sure.
I want the old running me back without this bloody disease knocking me back when I’m making progress.

Now both the boys are back at gym and Matt is being super serious about his training I will tweak my meals more for them.

I did make a lovely meatball dish with oats tonight that I think you will enjoy. Has spices also. Will write up for you.

Love the fact you’re getting compliments from the ladies! Maybe take it in steps and remark on them with a positive comment.

Super proud of you!

Plus tell them ya have a friend in New Zealand that needs to run a security check on them before the first date!!!!

[oak]

Plus tell them ya have a friend in New Zealand that needs to run a security check on them before the first date!!!!

Mental Fairy, I will be sure to do so. Please send out vibes that someone will approach me, and that I have the strength to invite them out. Happily, I'm actively discussing these matters with my mental health counselor.

Friends!

My goals have coalesced into three broad categories:

1. Professional: If I accomplish nothing else, I want to secure a 100% remote position. Earning more would be next.

2. Feminine energy: I want to get out of the house 3-4 nights a week.

3. Physical: continue my modest (and fun!) efforts.

Friends, I am happy where this plan is, here in mid-December.

I'll flesh out the specifics, but for now this is good. I'll post more as indicated.

In the meantime, thank you for listening!

[oak]

Love the fact you’re getting compliments from the ladies! Maybe take it in steps and remark on them with a positive comment.

Mental Fairy, in honor of you, and inspired by your post above, I invited the pretty pulmonologist out for a drink after work on Thursday at the local bougie restaurant.

As I pressed send, at 1:52 pm Eastern, I sent grateful vibes to you, halfway around the world. (I hope your day got a little better at that moment, from the flow of good karma.)

I’ll let y’all know what she says. For now the important thing is that I listened to my friends’ advice and encouragement, promptly effecting an act of everyday courage. We’ll get through this together.

[Mental Fairy]

Oh thank you Oak.
I am super excited for your plans moving forward. Your kind words brightened my day today.
Be yourself when you go out and I can’t stress enough to please practice eye contact listening.

When someone looks you in the eye when you’re talking then you with have confidence you are being listened to.

[oak]

Be yourself when you go out and I can’t stress enough to please practice eye contact listening.

Mental Fairy! An update:

1. It turns out she is engaged. She doesn't wear a ring.

2. That said, we had a great time. I read your advice in this very thread right before she showed up. I effected your advice.

3. In addition to eye contact, I managed to make her laugh. She stated that I am "hilarious".

Thank you for your support, encouragement, advice, and experience/strength/hope, Mental Fairy!

You'll also be pleased to hear that I am getting started on my 2023 goals:

1. I registered for a virtual, year-long 500-miles at your own pace program.

btw, speaking of why a person will walk 500 miles, this song still slaps: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aJ9usrpAPao&ab_channel=TheProclaimers-Topic

2. I registered for the April 15 Zoom kettlebell competition. I have a looong way to go, and I want to get to a lower weight class.

3. My friend (above) stated she wanted to join me at the amateur competition for armlifting (a niche type of strength contest for hand grip) at the Arnold in March. (Hmmmm: women are motivated to spend time around men competing in strength competitions. Hmmmmmmm.)

4. I might try Gaelic football in 2023, which can help me face my limiting belief that "I can't run".

[manuel_moe_g]

Whoa! Awesome!

[Mental Fairy]

wow Oak, this is great. So pleased you have stepped out and taken steps you maybe might not have before.

This is one of those times i will i could meet you at a coffee shop and shoot the breeze!