I see so much mental illness in my Chinese family it's just not talked about. Maybe it's just my family and where we come from but stuff like this is so suppressed, I would have never ever discovered my own depression and ADHD if it weren't for a Canadian website and an American doctor and organization. I've had mild version of depression and ADHD from the time I was a child, like 4 years old and no one ever noticed because I wasn't allowed to talk about it. I wasn't allowed to tell people I was sad, to tell them that I can't concentrate, that something is wrong. It was mostly my family and the way they were raised. And I think I get what you're trying to say about people being too focused on their self. But I think people like Paul do it in a healthy way. In a way where you can admit your mistakes and flaws instead of trying to bury them within yourself, it's healthy for yourself, for the people who get to listen. Hell it may even cure a large part of depression.
Ever since I've been able to say that I'm not okay, to talk about myself, I've been better. I don't think myself or anyone who shares is feeding their neurosis because well it's different for everyone and I can only speak for myself. But I don't know what causes my depression it could be just biological or it could be stuff that happened but one of the effects depression has on me is isolation, self hatred and a messed up perspective on myself and my future. Talking about myself to other people negates these negative symptoms and stops the spiral. It's the opposite of feeding your neurosis, it's lessening it. Ignoring it, is burying yourself in your neurosis and the culture here, well it taught me to bury it and shut up about yourself (again only my experience I love China).
I don't know if any of that made sense or has a point but yeah. I'm glad you found a way to cope though, all the best in china it's a wonderful country. haha If you need some help with Chinese, simple useful phrases let me know, I'm a native speaker
PS have you had xiao long bao? ITS AMAZING.