What I am working on - therapy sessions

[manuel_moe_g]

OK, cannot take it for granted that there is a gap between stimulus and response.

So whenever I sense that precious gap between stimulus and response, this is what I do...

Breathe with diaphragm, through nose, inhale like blowing up a balloon in my belly, exhale like pressing that balloon against my spine.

Do that a few times, then visualize blue/green light hovering just in front of my face at eye-level, with wispy fingers of light coming off the surface. As I inhale, I also inhale the wispy fingers of light and they fill my body and touch the parts of my body, from the inside, that have tension coming from overwhelm. When I exhale, I exhale out the residue of the tension.

OK, with diaphragmatic breathing and peaceful blue/green light, I am know ready to use "cheerleader" talking to myself. The "cheerleader" is not a "rah-rah"-type, but instead an compassionate, invested, authentic voice. The way I talk to myself is by pretending I am talking to my daughter, because for some reason I have a mental-block with talking to myself compassionately. So I imagine my daughter in the same situation that I currently am in, with the same challenges, and I speak to her with the compassionate, invested, authentic "cheerleader" voice (but of course, I am really speaking to myself). I speak about a rational, balanced view of my situation & challenge, giving myself advice and perspective.

What I am aiming for is substituting a new action, a new way of thinking, a new sense of urgency, to replace my habitual short-term coping behavior. The new behavior will be one that works better for me in the long-term.

So, these are the four things, working together: (1) diaphragmatic breathing, (2) the peaceful blue/green light, (3) the "cheerleader", and (4) replacing short-term coping behavior with a long-term-focused action, thinking, and urgency.

[[[Friends, what do you think?]]]

[brownblob]

Whatever works. It is good that you have found a way to compassionately talk to yourself.

[oak]

Excellent, Manuel Moe.

You are well on your way.

[manuel_moe_g]

Having problem with anger today.

Breathing is important. Visualizing blue/green light is important.

Remember Slow is Fast and Fast is Slow. Take time to breathe properly and visualize blue/green light. That is the quickest way, overall.

My leg is bouncing, that is a sign that I need breathing and visualization.

If I have a hard time identifying places of tension in my body, just imagine working at dreaded tasks at a quick pace, and see where tension manifests in body from just imagining it.

I notice that when I am stressed, I make my breathing shallow and I take long pauses without breathing. This is the opposite of proper diaphragmatic breathing, which shows the soundness of starting the whole process with proper breathing.

[manuel_moe_g]

this is what i do while showering. showering is difficult for me, I hate that I am locked into a time-consuming, boring activity, infeasible to take a break in the middle of it (cannot lay down on the bed while naked, wet, and sudsy, of course)

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[*1*] Breathing (diaphragmatic breathing)

[2] inhaling healing blue/green light, exhaling tension or heaviness

[3] choice (always be re-choosing the long term gain)

[4] be in present time, mindful of just current step doing

[5] cheerleader guides me through the following:

[*] is it just negative imagination?

[*] proper context for coping, coping mechanisms really are best as reward

[*] no need for perfection

[*] remember it is very recoverable when "fall-down"

[*] help exists for me