The writer/performer (The Minor Accomplishments of Jackie Woodman, Lucky Louie, Will & Grace) opens up about being the product of a secret affair in a small town and being raised by a single mom with no boundaries.
Visit www.laurakightlinger.com or follow her on twitter @KingKightlinger
Episode 268: Laura Kightlinger
-
SpookyGhost
- Posts: 222
- Joined: January 5th, 2015, 8:19 am
- Gender: Female
- Issues: Anxiety, self harm, PTSD, childhood sexual abuse, rape, emotional eating
- preferred pronoun: She
- Location: Newfoundland, Canada
-
Bflosenrab
- Posts: 2
- Joined: March 11th, 2016, 8:09 pm
- Gender: F
- preferred pronoun: she
Re: Episode 268: Laura Kightlinger
I am still in the middle of listening to this episode, but I wanted to post about it already before I forgot. Not comfortable posting a reply on the FB page or Twitter because it's public.
Anyway, I just wanted to say that I really identify with Laura's story on 2 points below. I
1) I grew up about an hour or so away from her hometown and I knew what the Lily Dale namedrop was immediately
2) I am the product of an affair between a married woman whose marriage was pretty much non-existent and a close friend of hers. My birth mother was in her late 30s and not anticipating a pregnancy. WHOOPSIE! My story differs from this point on because I was given up for adoption and ended up ultimately being raised 2 states away from my blood relatives. My birth mother managed to conceal her pregnancy the ENTIRE TIME. After she died in 2009, her brothers, sisters-in-law, and everyone else said that they had absolutely no idea she was pregnant in 1981. When it was getting close to the due date, she went to a neighboring state claiming she was staying with a sick friend and had me there. End of my association with her, right? Nope. My birth parents were both in my life from the beginning because they were very close friends of my adoptive parents. I spent my whole childhood thinking these people (and the children who turned out to be my half-siblings) were my FRIENDS and not blood relatives. It's too complicated to get into who knew exactly what and when, but suffice it to say I was initially kept a secret while I was still in the womb, and I was surrounded with many secrets afterward (and at times having to keep those secrets later on when I got older and I was not yet comfortable in revealing the real relationships to others, say at a party we were all attending.) So I totally understood Laura asking "what do I call him? Dad?" and "no, you should call him this," "don't acknowledge him if you see him with his family around town," etc. It's fucking maddening.
Oh, and P.S. - My half siblings? Yeah, they're also my fourth cousins. Turns out an ancestor of their father (we share the same mother) married an ancestor of my birth father. You couldn't make this stuff up if you tried. Total fucking Lifetime movie potential. I have good relationships with my birth family and my bio dad eventually found out I was his daughter before he died last year. At least I can't say my life is boring.
Anyway, I just wanted to say that I really identify with Laura's story on 2 points below. I
1) I grew up about an hour or so away from her hometown and I knew what the Lily Dale namedrop was immediately
2) I am the product of an affair between a married woman whose marriage was pretty much non-existent and a close friend of hers. My birth mother was in her late 30s and not anticipating a pregnancy. WHOOPSIE! My story differs from this point on because I was given up for adoption and ended up ultimately being raised 2 states away from my blood relatives. My birth mother managed to conceal her pregnancy the ENTIRE TIME. After she died in 2009, her brothers, sisters-in-law, and everyone else said that they had absolutely no idea she was pregnant in 1981. When it was getting close to the due date, she went to a neighboring state claiming she was staying with a sick friend and had me there. End of my association with her, right? Nope. My birth parents were both in my life from the beginning because they were very close friends of my adoptive parents. I spent my whole childhood thinking these people (and the children who turned out to be my half-siblings) were my FRIENDS and not blood relatives. It's too complicated to get into who knew exactly what and when, but suffice it to say I was initially kept a secret while I was still in the womb, and I was surrounded with many secrets afterward (and at times having to keep those secrets later on when I got older and I was not yet comfortable in revealing the real relationships to others, say at a party we were all attending.) So I totally understood Laura asking "what do I call him? Dad?" and "no, you should call him this," "don't acknowledge him if you see him with his family around town," etc. It's fucking maddening.
Oh, and P.S. - My half siblings? Yeah, they're also my fourth cousins. Turns out an ancestor of their father (we share the same mother) married an ancestor of my birth father. You couldn't make this stuff up if you tried. Total fucking Lifetime movie potential. I have good relationships with my birth family and my bio dad eventually found out I was his daughter before he died last year. At least I can't say my life is boring.
-
Peanut
- Posts: 15
- Joined: March 17th, 2016, 3:01 pm
- Gender: Female
- Issues: Depression, Anxiety, PTSD, ADHD
- preferred pronoun: She
Re: Episode 268: Laura Kightlinger
Wow! We really are not alone! My mother married brothers. So she married one man, had 4 children, and then divorced him and married his brother and had my brother and myself. So, my half siblings are my cousins as well. I feel ya!
-
Bflosenrab
- Posts: 2
- Joined: March 11th, 2016, 8:09 pm
- Gender: F
- preferred pronoun: she
Re: Episode 268: Laura Kightlinger
Thanks. Your story sounds book-worthy. Life never fails to surprise me.