Episode 130: Cameron Esposito

[gfyourself]

The standup comedian (Late Night with Craig Ferguson) opens up about her conservative Catholic upbringing, doing volunteer work in Jamaica and coming to terms with being lesbian. She and Paul talk about bad porn, being turned on by things we wouldn’t want in real life and the heavy burden of being co-dependent.

[sdjustinr]

I love podcasts in general that feel more like conversations than interviews. This episode fit that bill to a T. Thanks Paul, totally amazing.

[shanarchy]

Thank you so much Cameron Esposito!

...and thanks to the woman who had the courage to tell you to please, not give kids the message that a foreigner can give them what they need.

I've been harboring this confused guilt for 7 years now and you have given me the answer asserting my intuition.

In 2006, I was in Dominican Republic on vacation and a gorgeous little girl came up to me and asked me for a dollar.
I had a dollar in my pocket, but my intuition held me back.
I had a feeling that she shouldn't just come up to a stranger and ask for money.

I did have a camera on my hand and I asked her if I could take her photo.
She said yes and she called other kids to gather around for it.
Even giving her a dollar for accepting to take her photo didn't feel right.

When I came back home, I told my Mom about it and she got so angry with me for not giving her the dollar.
She thought of the poor girl needing a dollar.
I thought of a future woman not needing to beg.

Image: *Second girl from right to left.
Doesn't she have the most gorgeous smile?
She looks straight into the camera, no fear.
Amazing.

[meronym]

Listening to discussion about feeling uncomfortable watching porn that doesn't match your own sexuality, in this case porn with penises. Many people get more excited watching 'non-matching' porn for a lot of reasons. For instance, I'm a straight chick, and I like watching gay male porn. Maybe because I feel like I'm peeking at something that doesn't belong to me. Voyeurism with a touch of taboo. Or maybe because the mismatch gives me weird feelings, and those feelings turn me on. Maybe that's why non-matching porn is more exciting, sometimes, than porn where we can put ourselves in the middle of it mentally. When the porn matches, you might be thinking about how uncomfortable a position would feel if it were you. You might be comparing yourself physically to the actor(s) and feeling inadequate. But if the porn doesn't match your sex life, it becomes more purely fantasy, where no one ever gets a cramp in an unfortunate spot, or has to worry about trying to just catch their breath.

[Paul Gilmartin]

Thanks for that insight Meronym. That makes sense.

Paul