Episode 158 - Melissa Stetten

[CharlotteC]

Not one of the best interviews -- Melissa didn't seem very articulate, or passionate about anything -- but it led me to her blog, where she posted Joan Didion's "Goodbye to All That" in full. I'd never read it, so I appreciate it was there, and it leads me to think Melissa has many deep feelings that she maybe isn't ready to let out right now. Maybe she's in transition, but she seemed very self-protectively reticent, and very reliant on her looks (she giggled a lot, like pretty girls do to distract you from the fact that they're not saying anything). What came through was that she's very anxious about her career, and aging, and being a "woman of substance," which she's not (quite) yet. My hope for her is that she gets away from the men she's been dating/allowing to run her life, and pursues something she really cares about, something difficult and absorbing that takes her out of herself (i.e., not a personal blog). Maybe school, or involvement with a charity or cause. I get the feeling that a stable marriage and children would make her very happy, but she's dating guys who want an accessory, not an equal partner. Talking to (and reading) older and wiser women might help her truly understand the value of character over good looks.

[gfyourself]

I was disappointed in this episode as well. No wonder Paul took a year to put it up!

[inmymind]

I liked the ideal behind this podcast in that Melissa was still in the middle of dealing with her challenges. I also love the podcasts where the guest didn't have a "big" problem such as being raped as a child, or had super messed up parents. Where they had more or less a "normal" upbringing, but still fought with depression or anxiety. I like the way Paul explains this situation as being (I'm paraphrasing) "What the hell is wrong with me? I was raised with more or less everything a kid could want and need, so why am I so messed up?"

[flyinginside]

I agree with you, Charlotte. And also appreciate your compassion. She definitely seems 'in transition' and I had empathy for her, as I'm around her age and feel she's just a few years behind.