Sleep apnea, GERD, and obesity: efforts to fix this.

[snoringdog]

Don't know much about Jung, but I think neurosis *can* be suffering, and not just a substitute.
Until the neurotic understands why they're that way, they can truly suffer.
Am I wrong?

P.S Oak -

Take time to stretch in the morning, and stand tall!

[oak]

1. SnoringDog, hello! Yes, one’s definition of “neurotic” probably deserves its own thread. A big, important topic. Also, thank you very much for the morning-stretching recommendation. My physical therapist wants me to stretch twice a day, so we are all in agreement. Well said, my friend. I’ll keep you posted.

2. Friends, I have something to say:

I really love Old Bay seasoning. It is divine.

I’m not sure what my beloved Old Bay has to do with obesity (replacing fats with spice?), but there you go.

[Mental Fairy]

Had to look up old bay seasoning. Never heard of it.

[oak]

Please try it sometime. It is a real treat.

Also, a quick google search shows that the main (and at the same time, subtle) flavor, celery, is safe for our duck friends in its natural form.

[Mental Fairy]

Hehe you made me smile!!!

Thank you Oak, I needed that my friend.

I hope you are doing ok my friend. I know it’s the weekend and not one goes by where I don’t think of you and rivergirl as I understand you both struggle with weekends.

Keen to learn how you are going with your walking and movement with stretching are going.

Mental hugs

[oak]

Friends! An update:

Sleep apnea

I suppose I still have it, but it is nothing like 2020.

CPAP was a failure, but I'm hoping curing my obesity (below) can cure my sleep apnea. I still don't wake refreshed.

GERD

I've had GERD once in the last year. I really hate GERD.

Obesity

My weight has plateaued again, though my dietician will no doubt be delighted this upcoming week to hear I've reduced my pop consumption.

I just wrapped up a beta phase of an obesity study; I've been invited to join the upcoming next stage.

And, while I have no idea why it works, I find that I lose weight/maintain lower weight when I track my eating. It is almost magical.

[Mental Fairy]

Hi Oak

Your last comment about it being magical I think maybe because you’re so very conscious doing that act of maintaining and driving the numbers down. That’s powerful stuff my friend. Be proud.

[oak]

Thanks, Mental Fairy!

Friends! A kinda downer update, with a repressed memory, and a dream I can hardly hope for.

Currently: Obesity, sleep apnea, and GERD
I was on a local dating show: a repressed memory that just came back
I bare my soul: a goal/hope/vision I can hardly hope for

Currently: Obesity, sleep apnea, and GERD

The good: In the last year I had mild GERD twice, and both were 100% due to eating right before bed. In 2020 my life was hell from GERD, multiple times a week. I don't know how I lived like that, and things are much better now.

Obesity and sleep apnea: I've inched back into obesity, and my sleep apnea is recurring. I've gained a few pounds back, but have a plan for nutrition this summer. More soon.

I was on a local dating show years ago: a repressed memory that just came back

In graduate school, 20 years ago, I was on the campus TV first-date show called, I kid you not, "Desperate for a Date".

(Happily there is zero evidence of this show online.)

She was an undergrad: a cutie, a real spitfire, but alas, at the interview afterwards (back at the studio) after she declined a second date from me, on television, stating she preferred "more athletic guys".

Ouch.

I just unrepressed that memory.

I of course hold no ill will to her: she was honest.

Ironically, I got into fitness fifteen years later when I was diagnosed with sleep apnea. We all have latent athletes inside, and mine has come out. I did it for me, because I didn't want to die from sleep apnea. Still, I am glad to be around people who have built me up and encouraged my fitness.

I bare my soul: a goal/hope/vision I can hardly hope for

Text, such as here in a forum thread, on a screen, can hardly demonstrate the pathos of what I'm about to type:

My secret wish is to (1) change careers so I can be able to afford (2) proper/modern fitness clothes and (3) have a woman come pick out these clothes with me (as a date!).

This is very much a wish: currently, I wear beat up old Walmart undershirts to barre. They are not modern or fitted or wicking. I want to change careers so I can buy proper clothes for barre class. And, most "out there"/almost more than I can hope, is to invite a young woman out to help me pick out such clothes... as a date.

I have no idea how I will either earn more or get a date. I have no idea. Just a barely-alive, tiny hope.

I've successfully changed careers and been on dates before, of course.

I am just a little short on hope. I can imagine going on such a date, but I can't really see it, if that makes sense.

There you have it, my friends: I bare my soul.

Getting secrets out is scary.

[Mental Fairy]

Hi Oak

Ok first things first, you’re incredible. You have shared something that you felt needed to be a secret. Maybe feel some shame, embarrassment or rejection feelings that make you feel uncomfortable when you recall them.

This morning I was sitting at some traffic lights and recalled an event that happened to me. It made me want to pull my skin off. Honestly I can’t even think about it in its totality because of how it makes me feel. So what happens with that thought, particularly remembering it then stopping the thought process so I don’t have to feel it…..it sits below the surface and the emotions that are kept at bay begin to chip away at our minds in a way and we begin the process of suppressing it with food, unhealthy fluids, self abuse, self criticism. It spirals.

You bringing up that memory I can only see as healthy. You’re on the right path. You can do this Oak.

We got this.

[oak]

Mental Fairy, thank you for your encouragement, and sharing your experience at the traffic light. These are things we don’t talk about, but think about.

Since you so kindly encouraged me when I shared an old secret, here is a brand new one:

In HIIT class tonight I was appalled to see, in the wall mirror, that I have gynecomastia (or more likely adipomastia). This is shocking for any man, and I was immediately filled with sorrow.

Brief rant

Let me be very clear: I know very well what the mocking word for this is called, and I don’t identify with it. I’ll admit the Seinfeld scene is a chuckle; that said, I’m not a 90s sitcom. I’m a man, a human. I have dignity. Anyone can use that word. I’m not identifying with that for a second. If someone has a problem with my body, then they have a problem. That’s not my problem.

End rant

I’m still working through this shocking experience.

I think the best thing I can choose to do is to be sure to the gym tomorrow and wear a similar shirt and just be me.

And dang, I need to effect a nutrition plan asap lol.

But I won’t be shamed by my body. Sad, yes. Shame, no.