My very first post to this forum, 11 years ago!

Whether it is good or bad, talk about it here.
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manuel_moe_g
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My very first post to this forum, 11 years ago!

Post by manuel_moe_g »

https://mentalpodforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=2085#p2085
I am 40 years old, male, depressed all my life, suffering from anxiety all my life, specifically social anxiety and anxiety around romantic relationship.

Had my biggest breakdown at the age of 25, that was when I got serious about getting professional help and taking medication and changing the trajectory of my life.

I am married now, our little family includes a smart and silly daughter. Our little house is loud with contention, fighting, sarcasm and criticism, but also laughter and warmth and taking about feelings and life goals and moral principals. I feel lucky, considering my profound isolation in college.

The biggest help to me has been Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy. Prozac had a big effect on me, and was a life changer, but the effect diminished to practically nothing. I take Neurontin and Effexor, and I don't wish to modify my medication or dosages, because I am quite stable now (still have what I would describe as manageable depression and anxiety, manageable with treating myself with cognitive behavior therapy).

Haven't had great long-term experiences with therapists, so I haven't seen one in years.

My challenge currently is staying productive while in a depressed state. I am terrified that all my dreaming of accomplishments was nothing more than a distraction, because I cannot turn any of my goals into motivation. My temptation is to barely push myself at all, and give in to any distraction or time-wasting amusement, and then just sleep my life away.
The more things change, the more things stay the same... :roll: :lol:

The biggest changes are that I found a really great therapist, and that I found out ADHD was hiding behind my depression and anxiety
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oak
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Re: My very first post to this forum, 11 years ago!

Post by oak »

Manuel Moe, thank you for sharing.

I am charmed that you had such a clear understanding of what you were facing.
Work is love made visible. -Kahlil Gibran
A person with a "why" can endure any "how". -Viktor Frankl
Which is better: to be born good or to overcome your evil nature through great effort? -Skyrim
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Mental Fairy
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Re: My very first post to this forum, 11 years ago!

Post by Mental Fairy »

Wow Manuel Moe. Wow. Thank you so so so much. Mental hugs for you my friend. Your an amazing person. I tried Effexor and was horrible for me. Effected my heart rate and ended up with brain zapping. Never again! So glad it worked for you.
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snoringdog
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Re: My very first post to this forum, 11 years ago!

Post by snoringdog »

Had the same with Effexor, not good.

(Where do they get these drug names? :) )
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Mental Fairy
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Re: My very first post to this forum, 11 years ago!

Post by Mental Fairy »

Wonder if it’s mums the police computer thing where they name cases silly things like operation canvas or operation steam roll.

I do know that some of this drugs are with more than my car. Would rather chew on my bumper than gulp down some of those meds.
rivergirl
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Re: My very first post to this forum, 11 years ago!

Post by rivergirl »

I've been here almost as long as you have, MM.

You've been such a consistently helpful and kind presence, and I've watched your growth over the years even if it's sometimes hard for you to see it. You're awesome!

rg
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Mental Fairy
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Re: My very first post to this forum, 11 years ago!

Post by Mental Fairy »

Absolutely agree rivergirl. My first contact was with Manuel Moe and it was a blessing.
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manuel_moe_g
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Re: My very first post to this forum, 11 years ago!

Post by manuel_moe_g »

Thanks RiverGirl and Mental Fairy! To hear that makes me feel good!
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