A week of anxiety hierarchy exposures: studying, outside, dating, work expectations.

[oak]

Using my beloved Bourne Anxiety Workbook, I have decided to face four major anxieties this week:

1. Going outside (disturbed neighbor watches for me to leave my apartment, stares at me) to take out the trash, walk to the grocery store, or enter/exit my car. [See edit at end.]
2. Studying professional skills (completing lessons in six month Google certificate).
3. Inviting a woman out on a date (next Friday is a upscale drinks-and-dancing-and-fancy-dress at the regional world-class museum), if the opportunity presents itself.
4. Renegotiating my work expectations (and resigning if indicated).

Per Bourne, here are my tools:

1. Wim Hof breathing method.
2. Encouraging self-talk statements.
3. Have a "emergency bailout" plan if my anxiety exceeds a 6 on a scale of 1 to 10.
4. Stay in the phobic exposure situation just a little longer than needed.
5. Reward myself for victories.
6. Have a support person (this forum!).

And from my own experience, here are my good habits:

1. Be showered, shaved, and in clean clothes.
2. Avoid HALT, especially hungry.
3. Be hydrated and taken my prescribed Buspar.

I have the prescribed 6-10 hierarchical steps (eg increasingly anxiety-creating actions, from "easiest" to most demanding).

While I won't return to the office until late in the week, I can try the first three (fear of neighbor, completing lessons, and showing interest in women) Monday and Tuesday.

Wish me luck!

Edit regarding my threatening neighbor:

Avoiding her, and not being predictable about my going and arrival, is clearly the best choice now. This is not an unreasonable anxiety: it is wholly reasonable, and has real stakes that could escalate.

Acknowledging that, I must avoid falling into agoraphobia.

Perhaps the goal is to make smart, safe choices. A difficult situation. But one that is worthy of confronting.

[Mental Fairy]

Hi oak

Wow, you’re onto it!

Just a thought I wish to steal from SD, EarPods in ears, turn on some music and don’t make eye contact with the mad lady! Walk away! Even hum to yourself and carry on. You win!