What does the OCD brain look like?

[snoringdog]

Hello Mental Fairy,

I do, at times. Some things more than others...

And I need to, and have reminded myself that "I'm just fighting with ghosts" and it's not helping me, in the now... waste of energy and "spoons".

(A little bit of CBT I guess).

SD

[snoringdog]

I'm noticing a bit more obsession / obsessive thoughts lately, not sure what to think.
Just trying to relax and let them pass...

One example from today's commute-

To preface, Inthewhitehouse posted this

but had to stop driving in the end due to panic attacks.

So, during the driving commute in today, there was a three-car fender-bender on a local ramp.
One car must have stopped abruptly and the next one rear-ended it. The third one rear-ended that. So a three-car sandwich. Serious damage but didn't look like any serious injuries.

Saw a two-car crash on the way home. So many distracted drivers lately.

So, the obsessive part was during a stretch down a four-lane highway (two and two) with a yellow stripe down the center. Quite congested with heavy trucks and traffic coming the opposite way. Speeds range from 25 ~ 45. Once in a while an oncoming vehicle will give a hint toward the center line...

So, I'm starting to feel uneasy and anxious about some kind of head-to-head clip if not a downright head-on. So, started talking to myself - "People are stupid and crazy, but not *that* stupid and crazy. It's just your imagination... take it easy. Breathe."

Then, bang! A guy on one of those little powered scooters appears right in front me, having weaved thru the stopped cars in the opposing lanes, and just starting to cross the yellow line!
I honked, and he went parallel to them, which probably was his original intention, but who knows? Quite reckless, and such small room for error.

Those things are a curse BTW. They're starting to appear again and I've had a couple of close encounters on the sidewalk while walking toward work.

I'm not antisocial, but people are unpredictable, and tiring.

Need to control my blood pressure, anger, and anxious/obsessive thinking while driving...

[Mental Fairy]

Hi SD

I so relate. Joe now is back driving on the road and his dashcam caught a lady coming at him head on just to pass a truck in the opposite lane. He came so close to killing herself and him that he saw the whites of her eyes. My OCD is fully invested in truckers! I honestly give them so much room and time as i am aware of the challenges of going through 16 gears to slow down. I get so angry at other drivers whom don't do the same and become very anxious driving. The amount of people on those scooter things and those little four wheel buggy things driving on the road has tripled.

I stopped going to the supermarket weeks ago and have it delivered as my anxiety gets so high going through the supermarket with a trolley!!!

The feeling in the air currently is people are becoming less tolerant, have an empty tank of patients and have no respect. Hence when you experience compassion and courtesy it is complete shock to us.

I was meant to meet up with a friend yesterday afternoon for a walk and i pulled the pin at last minute as i couldn't face going out again. I feel safer in my office than i do outside.

[snoringdog]

Hello Mental Fairy,

I still get anxious and sometimes angry while driving, seeing a lot of dim-witted and aggressive behaviour. Trying to work on that.... The Thomas Hayes episode was helpful when he spoke of anger management, and that his anger was coming from fear, or a sense of injustice. Those resonated with me. But I'm telling myself that my anger will not change the other driver at all, but that it only affects me...

I've gotten into the habit lately of signaling to other drivers that I see them, and am anticipating their desire to turn, or merge etc. Usually by flicking my brights, or with a wave.

I love it when the truckers flick their tail-lights as a thank-you (do they have a special switch for that?).

Reminds me of when travelling on the highway as kids in the back seat, and seeing semis in the next lane. We would mime the pull-cord action for a horn-honk. What a pleasure and thrill when the driver would give their air horns a blast in reply!

[manuel_moe_g]

I've gotten into the habit lately of signaling to other drivers that I see them, and am anticipating their desire to turn, or merge etc. Usually by flicking my brights, or with a wave.

This is a cool idea, SnoringDog!

[snoringdog]

So, I've been haunted lately about things in the news - either snippets that I've read, or pictures that I've seen. (I've said before that I'd like to become a hermit or a monk, but that's not possible right now, nor probably healthy...).

Some things stop me short and are hard to process. Some things stick in my mind, excessively/obsessively so.

Washing dishes - "Look at the water I'm using.. With what's happening in the West... Lake Mead drying up... How will everyone manage?

Sleeping in a warm bed - "How can I be comfortable when people are freezing and possibly dying from the cold, in Ukraine".

Living in general - "I'm pretty lucky. Do I deserve this? What about...?"

Pictures from the natural world - Nature is a refuge from the stresses from people and society, but it has its own harshness as well.

How to keep a balance and set some sort of mental boundary to keep from getting into a negative spiral?

Having lost my religion, there's No one to pray to. No one to blame...

[Beany Boo]

Sometimes it’s easy to keep escalating the worry than to pause it.

Pause it. For 5 minutes. Go stare at a tree. It’ll hurt but sounds necessary.

Beany Boo <- meddler

[Mental Fairy]

It’s so so hard to not look at news. Doing my head in looking all the time. We can’t change anything yet it’s so toxic to our current mind.

100% understand this feeling.

[snoringdog]

So, I've lost a bit of the balance I thought I had for the last couple of weeks...
Thinking too much, beginning to obsess about things.
And that brings depression, and hints of despair.

In the Shona language, it's "kufungisisa" (First heard that term in a CBT lecture)

https://exploringyourmind.com/the-dangers-of-thinking-too-much/

And good idea Beanie, that's why I like birdwatching.
(I love trees too, don't get me wrong. )

[manuel_moe_g]

Hey SnoringDog,

i have recurring depressing/self-abusing thoughts

now i immediately think & redirect by telling myself

"everything bad about myself is either inborn or forced on me by my outside environment, so it is not under my control"

"everything good about myself is because of my true nature"

SnoringDog, are you able to likewise redirect?